Living with
Cancer can cause many different emotions such as fear and anger. These emotions might affect how you feel about sex. Your partner might also feel very strong emotions.
Changes to your appearance may make you feel less confident about sex. It might change the way you feel about yourself and how you think others see you.
It is very common to have difficulty with intimacy and sex after cancer treatment. You can consider:
talking things through with your partner
talking to your doctor or specialist nurse
getting your GP to refer you to a counsellor
Your doctor or nurse might be able to provide some advice or they can suggest where you can find support.
Some people worry that they can catch cancer from others by kissing. But cancer can't be caught from somebody else. So you can reassure them.
It is safe for you and your partner to kiss and have any type of physical contact that you feel comfortable with.
Try talking to your partner about your feelings. It’s hard for them to understand unless you explain how you feel. Discussing it together might help you both adjust to a new situation together.
You will both gradually get used to your new situation if you are able to talk to your partner about your worries. A caring and loving partner will want to be supportive.
A few people have difficulty in speaking after surgery for some types of salivary gland cancer. This can affect your lovemaking. These difficulties are usually temporary and most people are able to talk within a few weeks after treatment.
Speech or communication difficulties might affect how you feel about sex. It might feel like more effort than before. It may change some of the spontaneous moments you and your partner are used to. Eye contact and touch can be alternative ways to show feelings if speech is difficult.
If you feel nervous about starting your sex life again, try not to worry. You might need more time to come to terms with all that has happened to you. If you are still worried, anxious or depressed, you are not likely to feel like having sex. Give yourself time. And talk things over with your partner. Together you should be able to work out what is best for you both.
You may find it helps to talk to your nurse or doctor about difficulties with your sex life after treatment. They can refer you for specialist help if needed.
Last reviewed: 12 May 2023
Next review due: 12 May 2026
Getting practical and emotional support can help you to cope with a diagnosis of salivary gland cancer. It can also help you with life during and after treatment.
Salivary gland cancer and its treatment can affect how you eat. Radiotherapy to your head and neck can cause a dry mouth and loss of taste.
Surgery that involves your jaw, face or mouth may change the way you look. Your surgeon will do everything they can to minimise this.
Treatment for salivary gland cancer depends on where the cancer is, the size, whether it has spread anywhere else and your health.
Salivary gland cancer can start in any of the glands that make spit (saliva). As well as 3 major pairs of salivary glands we have over 600 smaller, minor salivary glands throughout the lining of the mouth and throat.
About Cancer generously supported by Dangoor Education since 2010. Learn more about Dangoor Education
Search our clinical trials database for all cancer trials and studies recruiting in the UK.
Meet and chat to other cancer people affected by cancer.
Questions about cancer? Call freephone 0808 800 40 40 from 9 to 5 - Monday to Friday. Alternatively, you can email us.
