Stepdad has terminal cancer, supporting Mum

Hi. My Stepdad has been diagnosed with terminal cancer. He has been through chemo and radiotherapy but sadly nothing has worked. 
 

He has tumours in and around his brain which cruelly have affected his speech. Since getting his terminal diagnosis he hasn't been able to communicate with anyone. 
 

My Mum is understandably struggling both with dealing with the diagnosis mentally and coping with the physical side of caring for him on a day to day basis. Sadly she hasn't had a lot of support. He has carers visiting during the day, but the evenings can be very difficult, particularly when he has accidents. 

I feel guilty that I can't do more to help with the physical side of caring for him, but I have a disability myself which limits what I can do. 
I'm just wondering if any of you could offer advice on the best way I could support my Mum through this. Mentally we're all finding it so tough. My Stepdad is such a good person. It's heartbreaking that this has happened to him. 

  • Welcome to the Cancer Chat community PJMKUK although I'm very sorry to hear about your stepdad.

    This must be very difficult but I hope you and your mum can take some strength, and comfort, from knowing you are not alone as so many of our members have been in similar situations with their loved ones and hopefully some of them will be along soon to share their experiences and advice.

    I hope this information we have for family and caregivers and advice on looking after your mental health when caring for someone with cancer will prove useful, but if you'd like to discuss any of this with one of our cancer nurses, they're just a phone call away on 0808 800 4040, Monday - Friday between 9a.m - 5p.m. They're very supportive and may be able to help you figure out where and how to access more support at home for your mum and stepdad.

    I'm not sure if you have had any contact with Marie Curie, but if you haven't, do be sure to reach out to them as they have a lot of advice on how to care for someone with a terminal illness as well.

    I really hope this helps and wish you and your family all the very best at this challenging time.

    Kind regards,

    Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator