Hello Chris2020

I couldn't read your post without stopping by to offer condolences on behalf of the whole Cancer Chat team at the loss of your wife. It must be an incredibly difficult time for you and for your boys and I hope that you have friends and family around who are able to offer support. 

I also wanted to try and put you in touch with [@Bistokid79]‍ who recently lost his wife and has a 3 year old daughter. You can read his thread here. He may respond as I've tagged him into my reply here but you may also want to post a response on his thread and hopefully the two of you will be able to talk and support each other. 

I know that many of our members here will understand the pain that losing a loved one can cause and I'm sure they will stop by to share their support with you too. 

You might like to have a look at the Cruse website at some point too. They are a charity that offers bereavement support to both adults and children. It may be useful if you find that your boys, particularly your elders, need some support with all that has happened. 

Keep in touch Chris. As you say, talking does help and we will do our best to support you. 

Best wishes, 
Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator 

I am so sorry to hear for your loss !!

And really feel for your kids and you can't even begin to imagine how you are feeling !! You are wife was too young to go !!

But you will have to be strong for you kids, I hope you have family friends support network . It definitely helps talking to other people. 

I have lost two relatives to cancer one of them was who had two girls (one 9 and one was 11 ). That was 10 year ago 

Jeet123

 Thank you for your kind words  The best I can say is I'm very very fragile at the moment loved / love my wife so much  but her last words were o love you so much please look after the kids you are a great dad please don't come and find me  until you live your live  so I gave her my word x hope your ok?im so sorry just saw your post  I'm so sorry To hear you have breast cancer but you're right it's good to get it checked out straight away I'm here to talk if you want to

Hi Chris 2020

Im so sorry to read about your wife, it must be so difficult for you and your family. Nothing prepares anyone for that. I have had breast cancer myself so can understand how scarey it feels and how lost. I also lost my sister to cancer a couple of years ago. It's going to be very tough but it will gets little easier but it takes dayby day and you never forget the person you've lost. I'm sure you will get lots of support here. Take care x

Thank you for your kind words and having time to send me a message  I'm glad your ok now  I kind of understand how worrying it all is  going through all of it 

Hi Chris 2020 

Yeah I had surgery about six weeks ago and will have radio therapy in two weeks time 

Its understandable that you are very  fragile as it's been only few days , you lost your other half it s going to be painful journey but time heels!

I was only 3 year old when my dad dad died and my mum brought 2 kids her own and she did very good job of it!!

You have to be very brave for your kids take one step at time and ask for help and support when you need it from family and friends. 

And please keep us informed how you been doing and if needs to talk 

Take care 

Jeet123

Six weeks  wow I remember all the radiotherapy  good luck  I'm sure everything will work out for you ( my wife would hate me saying that) she would want me to say  you go girl and kick the cancer s *** keep strong   You can do this  her words seem much better than mine. X

Thanks Chris

I am the lucky one that cancer was diagnosed very early and it was stage 1 !! I am staying positive 

Sounds that your wife was very strong women !! 

What was her cancer stage? And how long ago she was diagnosed? I hope don't mind me asking ? 

Look after yourself and the kids 

This must be very lonely times as with covid 19 cant see many people !!

I hope you are getting lot of support from family if cant see people in person do video calls etc so your chilldern can attract with the family! 

Take care God bless you 

Hello  my wife was first diagnosed in 2014  stages 2 close to 3   She had no pain she just felt a lump in her breast  we we're always Checking  we loved her boobs/ body  or thinking about it maybe she just got them out for me. anyway I few weeks later   Chemotherapy then the operation basically made her a new boob with her tummy fat  got lots of cancer cells out then radiotherapy which he sailed through And that Herceptin drug  6years on she got the all clear cancer had gone  in that time we got married and had another beautiful boy  in 2018-2019 then it came back a lot stronger she had chemo again but couldn't have many tablets as the heart was weak  chemo starting to work then went down hill fast  cancer has spread to her lungs and heart only lasted about 3weeks  di so at least we had time to say goodbye x she loved talking to people on here  so I felt are give it a go x

Thank you for the reply 

It's very sad that after given all clear it came back 

I found this site very usefull and  it helps to come terms pain and with sad feelings 

Take care 

Jeet123