Please don't worry about this. Everyone deals with grief in their own way and, until it happens, you don't know how it will affect you. 

No one will think any the less of you if you don't cry, they will just think you are being strong for your dad and that is probably what will be required. Your dad will need you to help him get through this & you may find, whilst being there for him, that it suddenly hits you and you do cry. There are no right and wrong ways to deal with the loss of your mum, just let yourself ride with the waves that will wash over you. xx

Hi 

Firstly sorry for the loss of your Mum I know words are pretty useless. Please do not worry about not crying at your mother's funeral. I did not cry at my mother's funeral and I love my mother with all my heart. Even now eight months on I feel I still haven't cried enough. I've learnt that everyone is unique to how they grieve. 

You know how you feel and how much you loved your mother and be certain you mother knew too how much you loved her. Try not to worry about what people think, I myself expected to fall apart after my mother but we have no choice but try and carry on. Try to be kind to yourself and you do or don't do what feels best for you. I know the brain can act in a way where it protects you and only allows you to process a certain amount. I know personally I've blocked a lot out not intentionally but it's just the way I've been. Grief also seems to come hand in hand with guilt. Guilty for not crying enough I feel like that pretty much everyday. 

Thinking of you

X x x x

Hi thanks for replying

i cried an awful lot before it happened so in a way i feel like i did some grieving before my mum actually died

im just waiting for the tears to flow and that worries me because i know it is going to hit me so hard and dont think i will know how to cope how to deal with it

x

I think we do grieve before our loved ones pass. I know I grieved for the person my mother was before she was ill if that makes any sense. Cancer changed everything for our little family. It still feels like I'm living in a surreal world. 

I know what you mean about feeling frightened about letting it hit. I'm still like that when I feel the pain of missing my mother and all we've lost, I feel like I need to stop it before it all comes out and completely incacipates me. Right or wrong I don't know but I'm trying to take it day by day. I did start writing things down it might help you a little. Also just reading on here and thinking we're not totally alone, people do understand. 

Try and take support from family and friends around you.  You will find strength from somewhere. I'm sure my mother gives me strengh to keep going. 

X x x

Hi there, I didn't cry at my hubbys funeral. But when everyone had gone home except for my daughter. I cried like I was never going to stop. I played a CD that he bought me over and over. This went on for days  every week and every month at least some point I cried. The first twelve months I can't remember my days what I did where I went. Grieving is awful and we all have our own ways of dealing with it. I haven't cried now for over two years. I can't forgive cancer for taking him away from me. But I learnt to live my life without him. I now he pops and sees me sometimes which is lovely to me. Whether it is in my head or not. He is always with me and never very far from my thoughts. We just have to carry on. Try and have a good day Bless you. Xxx

Hi sandra i get the feeling my liz is around at times i dont think its in our heads keep your chin up it dosnt rain every day and one day the sun will shine not as brightly as befoe but it will best wishs .paul

Today is my grandads funeral he battled cancer for three years but a week ago he just went down hill and on Tuesday we were told he only had a few days and on Saturday he passed away. I only cried wen I got told that he had a few days left and a little bit wen I told my mum he didnt have long. I didn't cry wen he passed or wen I saw his body yesterday. Everyone else did and i feel bad like i have no soul or feelings