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17 Apr 2017 01:44

How do you handle all the waiting ... i just seem to be lurching from one bit of bad news to another with long waits in between . I was diagnosed with breast cancer in jan . Initial signs were we caught it very early and surgery was all i needed . During surgery it was found in lymph nodes and chemo was recommended.  So i have a scan as a formality im told before chemo and now they think it has spread to my spine.  Im wairing for an MRI on Wed to confirm that . Its all gone from being survivable to terminal in a few weeks . I can process it , the waiting is driving me mad . I have support and everyone has been amazing but i live alone and no matter how many films i watch or books i read i find myself obsessing every night about it . Tracy

Re: Waiting

17 Apr 2017 16:46 in response to TracyF

Sorry to hear about ur breast cancer Tracy if u can drink herbs there's a real good tea called snore 'n peace u can buy at the supermarket it helps me when anxiety takes ove r 

If it gets real bad talk to ur consultant or gp maybe they can give somthng stronger

Sandy xx

Re: Waiting

17 Apr 2017 16:57 in response to TracyF

Hi Tracy,

That sounds like a horrendous journey to have been on - from thinking it has been caught early to Stage 3 or Stage 4 must be hard to cope with. Tough question, have they used the word terminal with you? This usually means death is to be expected within a short space of time. There doesn't seem to be a formal definition but I believe the Dept. of Works and Pensions uses within 6 months when assessing for Personal Independence Payments.

It is very easy to confuse Stage 3 or Stage 4 with terminal, but the terms aren't necessarily synonymous (though they sometimes are). For example, I was diagnosed at Stage 4 with an incurable and inoperable cancer back in late 2013 and I'm still surviving well. I'm one of the lucky ones I know, but there are an increasing number of us about as treatments improve over the years.

How to cope with the waiting is a hard question to answer - anything that can distract you for more than a few minutes helps, books, DVD boxed sets (I watched the whole of Game of Thrones in a very very long binge session), Sudoko, Crosswords or whatever works for you. I actually went back to work for a few months after I was diagnosed - the stress of working helped me block things out while waiting for treatment to start and then to have a positive effect..


Good luck and best wishes


Re: Waiting

18 Apr 2017 00:40 in response to davek

Thank you Dave . No that dreaded word hasnt been used yet . Im filling in the blanks as we do and scaring myself . In part i think so i can be prepared if it is bad news because each time ive gone in for results ive been mega positive and each time its been a massive shock that its been bad news . This time im prepared for the worst but hoping for the best your story is very positive thank you for sharing and i hope things stay positive for a long time to come . Im a bit of a bix set junkie already and ive thought about going back ro work what with all the delays . I think im going to see how chemo treats me and make my mind up then . Im not going to wear a wig ive already decided and not sure hownwork wil like that !  Ha ha but in the great scheme of things they can take it or leave it.  Tracy 

Re: Waiting

18 Apr 2017 21:08 in response to TracyF

At least us pessimists are never disappointed Happy

Re: Waiting

20 Apr 2017 23:43 in response to TracyF

Hi TracyF

The waiting is the hardest part but once you have the confirmation of the type and stage, treatment should start pretty quickly. I was diagnosed with Stage 4B Hodgkins Lymphoma in March 2016 which was in my lymph nodes, neck, thorax, chest, pelvic,  bowel and spleen. I had six months of aggressive chemotherapy and gained complete remission in August 2016. Be strong, be positive, you can do it. Yes, the nights are the worst and sleep just will not come when you want it too so I used to just lie in bed and think of all the nice times I had had, like a day I enjoyed or the holiday I had and the best one was what would I spend my winnings on if I won the lottery. 

Re: Waiting

7 May 2017 00:33 in response to davek

I just wanted to.update and say i had good news from my scan . No secondary tumours . I have now started chemo which is going as well as can be expected . Thanks for your kind words 

Re: Waiting

7 May 2017 00:44 in response to TracyF

Hi Tracy

I'm Carol, diagnosed with tongue cancer December 2013. Had surgery, chemo and radiation.

Just wanted to Wish you  well in your treatment and please let us all know how you are getting on

Best wishes



Re: Waiting

7 May 2017 01:20 in response to TracyF

Hi tracy

my wife is exactly the same boat as you were!

her scan is next Wednesday but we've gone from thinking it was caught early and being optimistic to finding it in the lymph and feeling like the worlds ended again!

weve two young boys that help taking our mind off it for a bit but that also brings things into focus at times.

hope you keep getting more good news!