To watch someone you love going through Chemo

Hello, I hav e never done anything like this as i have always been strong but sometimes you need to let out .

My Husband was diagnosed with Bowel Cancer in May 2016 he had a CT Scan to see if had spread to which we were told no it had not we were thrilled (use the word Lightly ) .he went to have the opertaion to remove the tumour in the june and his surgeon checked through his belly button to see if there was any further disease and it was in his peritoneum so the operation did not go ahead. We are Grateful to the surgeon who checked .He had 3 months of Chemotherpy which was hard to watch him go through that ,Then a ct scan and the tumour had reduced in size which was very positive ,he then went to Basingstoke to have Sugarbaker operation in Dec 2016 he was in hosp for christmas the operation was a successful .The Surgeon was lovely and the hops and staff were Great .Came home and had another 3 months of chemo for (belts and Braces ).Had several  months off recovering from all and being normal . CT scan in Dec 2017   and showed Disease recurrence to liver and lungs had 6 months of chemo ct scan in june last chemo was on the 26-06-2018 scan results showed a vast improvement not visible to the eye had 4 months off another Ct Scan begining of oct back to his oncologist end of october and the disease had come back low level again in the liver and lungs so he is on another 6 months of chemo i feel so helpless as all i can do is be there for him for if he fancy something to eat or drink but he will get through this and knock back the disease again we are both looking head to next year for holiday and spending time together with the family .Sorry if i have gone on .

  • Hello Vernadette and welcome; I have read  your post and wondered how you have coped and remained positive over the last few years.  So many ups and downs; you haven't half been through it .    I trust you have good family and friends with whom you can share your concerns.  It does sound as though you are making a big effort to be positive for your husband;  how is he facing all of this?   Thank you for coming here and telling us your story.  I do hope you have a positive end for this soon.   Annie

  • Hi there I hope things improve for you it as they say with cancer it’s a rollercoaster ride, the most we can do is show love and support and understanding it’s a very hard place to be in ,take all the help you can get,and do contact your local hospice they can really help and advise you they are great people and are always there as well as your local McMillan they are all there to help don’t try and do this alone you will need help and support yourself you must look after you to , let us know how your doing take care Jean xxxxxx love to you both.

  • Hi Vernadette,

    Often the strong part IS sharing and venting, it protects your mental health!

    How you have coped with all this is remarkable.  I often say that I think cancer is harder on the loved ones and, when chemo is causing bad side effects, that is especially true.  In many ways I'm glad it's me going through it and not my husband, I couldn't be in your position.

    Sorry you've still got more of the journey to go, it must be so tiring and disheartening at times, but hopefully this will be it!

    Best wishes,

    LJx

  • Hello 

    Thankyou for your reply ,i hope you are doing well , They have told us my Husband is incurable but as we go further into the journey he is still with us and will be for many years .

    Take Care .

  • Hello

    Thank you for your reply My husband is still with me and i thank God every day as Two years ago we were told one to Two Years but he is here we no it is not incurable he is on a long Train Journey and he cant get off yet but as we go along  the journey we have hope the cancer has never made him ill its the chemo that does that but we will get there he will be here for a very long time . 

    Take Care .