Oh, Honey that is such a sad tale.

I do not expect you to be snowed under with replies, but do not assume that this is because people do not care.  Many, many do care (me included) but do not reply, for fear of saying the wrong thing.  I share that concern, but expect that silence is worse.  So here I am; more listening than talking.

You said that you are living near your husband's family.  Great!  But is there anyone nearby for you?  I would love to be able to help and to offer some comfort, but you don't know me from Eve.  (She was probably prettier, I could not even persuade Adam to take the rubbish out - let alone eat forbidden fruit!)

If Hubby has decided that he is not coming home there is not much you can do to persuade him.  But have you asked one of the oncology nurses or Doctors to talk to him?  They may be able to convince him otherwise.

Almost everything I can say to you is a platitude or a cliche, but those stupid words are still relevant, even if trite.  So stay strong for your kids, they are half his too and a physical manifestation of his love.  There are reasons, real reasons, to be positive.  Terminal does not have to mean tomorrow, treatments continue to advance and there are occasional miracles (My own darling hubby has beaten impossible odds three times.).  But if you need to give in to your grief and stress then that is ok.  You are human and have needs too.

I wish there were a way I could post you a hug.  Consider it intended at least.  - Maggie

My dear girl, how I feel for you right now and hw utterly dreaful this is for you to deal with let alone cope with it. You are doing an amazig job of looking afteyo your family and mving you all into your new home. I know you do not want to be there with him that is totally natural. As for your husband saying that he feels that he willnever leave hospital to live in the house you have purchased is also totally unserstandable as my dear husband, Andy who has advanced cancer, voice box and tongue said the same to me about the cottage we brought just last September when we relacated from Devon to Scotland. He was told he had t have an emergency tracheostomy and did not want it as he felt it pointless as he was going to die in the hospital without ever seeing the cottage again. So I spoke with the nurses and the consultant and they gace hima a pass from the hospital just for a few hours so I could take him back to the cottage. This reminded him what he was fighting for, his life with me at our cottage. Maybe once they have the infection under control this is something you could consider, get him there for just a few hours with you and your children, remind him that there is LIFE outside the hospital and he HAS to FIGHT for it. My love I will send you a friend request, here anytime you want to chat. we are all members of this club that no body wanted to join, but we are all here for one another. xxx  Karen