Together we will beat cancer



1 May 2016 16:07

My husband died 9 wk ago  my kids are very good  but life isnt the same  now i miss him so much  i just wish he could come back  and let me know he is ok 


3 May 2016 10:53 in response to Syl

Syliva, I am so very sorry for your loss, I know how it feels, my husband passed away in October and I miss him so much, I too wish they could let us know they are ok.  There are lots of people on here going through the same terrible time who will offer support.  Sending love to you Debbie xxxxxx


3 May 2016 15:46 in response to Deben

Thanks debbie ,its nice to know people care iwas married nearly 46 years  even though i do things during the day  your still coming home to a empty house i dont think i will ever get used to it  kind regards Sylvia x


3 May 2016 17:24 in response to Syl

Hi Sylvia. Very sorry about your loss. It is a terrible place to be. I lost my husband four months ago. I have terrible days when I don't want to be alive.  I feel do sad. I haven't started to move his personal belongings and they are still where he left them. Don't know when I will be able to do that. You are right family even our children don't take away the pain. I have good friends who take me out and they visit often which helps but not take away the pain which is very real. I was told I was on a journey which I was annoyed at but on reflection it is. I have lots of photographs around me of my special person at different stages of his life. I have also started a book and write down all my special memories. I have a counsellor not bereavement but one who has supported me along my own cancer journey. She just listens to my rants and when I leave I usually feel better.  Kindest regards and I will think of you and hope things improve. Anne 


3 May 2016 17:37 in response to Syl

Hi Sylvia

Am sorry for your loss and like Debbie has already said there are many of us here who understand your feelings just now.  I am further down the widowhood journey (lost hubby 16mths ago today) and certainly remember the total devastation that loss brings even when surrounded by family/friends.  You are right in that life will never be the same and for now your feelings of greif are very raw.  Be kind to yourself and come and post as and when you would like to.  Jules


29 May 2016 13:40 in response to Deben

Hi Debbie not heard off you in a while  hope your ok ,been out with my son and daughter on different ocasions  over the week end, it was lovely to get out and about for a while im well aware im alwaye coming home to a empty house. regards syl


29 May 2016 17:23 in response to Syl

Hi Syl, not been good for a few weeks now don't know whether its a stage or the nice weather but been very down, had my mum round today and got stuck into the garden, I just can't face going out with family or friends. Hope it passes soon.  Glad you have been out and about.   Take care thinking of you.  Debbie  xxxx


29 May 2016 23:04 in response to Deben

Sorry your feeling down  its a awful feeling  as if your never  going to feel happy again, i watered my garden tonight my husband always did it  ,its little things like that you realise how life has changed do you have kids Debbie? they can be a comfort  when your feeling down . take care Syl x


30 May 2016 09:34 in response to Syl

Hi Syl no I don't have children I do have good friends and family and my little neice is a joy. Debbie xxxx 


30 May 2016 11:15 in response to Syl

Hi Syl and Debbie

The early weeks and months after  such a deep loss (for some years even) throw up many emotions and even the presence of family and friends can sometimes present their own problems. Our feelings are so personal and sometimes difficult to explain to others but the forum gave me a much needed outlet for the emotional rollercoaster I found myself on.

I am somewhat further along the journey as it is almost 17 months since I lost hubby though the emotions still come and go. Earlier today I had a message to say my son's fiancee was in labour (week overdue) with their first baby and  I shed tears both in the happiness that is coming and the sadness that my hubby, who would have been so proud, is not here to share the moment in person.  I am grabbing on to the thought that he is in all our hearts and that the new baby will have some of his genes as she goes on with life's journey.

Hope you both have a peaceful day. x 


30 May 2016 15:47 in response to Deben

Hi Debbie hope your feeling better to day its lovely to have close friends and a lovely neice your close to i dont have granchildren my sister has a grandaughter but i hardly see her. Regards syl x


30 May 2016 16:00 in response to jules54

Hi Jules , hope every think goes well with the baby its something to look forward to, im sure your hubby is looking down with a smile on his face i can understand your mixed feelings sad and happy at the same timebut im sure the baby will fetch joy into your life .i wish i had granchildren its not to late yet but time is passing take care Syl x


30 May 2016 21:48 in response to Syl

Thanks Syl, just returned from having my first cuddle. Darcey Megan was born at 1.40 today weighing 8lb 5oz and all the family are doing well.  My first grand-daughter and she is beautiful but then I am biased!!

Hope you have had a relaxing and peaceful day.  Take care. Jules x


1 Jun 2016 10:15

Hi Cris  sorry i havnt replied up till now ,some days are ok  and i have bad days i try to get out  some days  i also go out 2 nights  a week ,the wk ends and nights  seem to be the worst my kids include me in things  but sometimes i feel like a spare part.regards Syl x


1 Jun 2016 10:27 in response to wilan

Hi Anne  sorry  i havnt replied sooner, its been 14 wk now  since ym husband died some times it feels like yesterday some days it seems  a  life time ago ,i  to have photos of my husband all over the house i speak to him all the time  and kiss his photo before i go to bed .hope your feeling ok Sylvia  x