The cruelest thing I’ve found with cancer currently is the cruel hope it gives us from time to time. My dad was told twice he was clear from bladder cancer from chemo, radiotherapy to a full bladder removal. but yet again in June we was told a new aggressive Tumor has formed its inoperable and incurable and my dad has 6-9 months to live like that, boom done. We have fought for more treatment as dads currently okay, gaining weight, getting fitter by the day so he’s currently on imnutherphy (has anyone experienced this??) the side affects are less harsh than chemo and bar fatigue and the runs he is dealing with it all great and having a ‘’normal life’’ yet this hadent changed the time line I’m so confused? The oncologist said a very very very small amount of people act amazing to the therapy and gain a few short years! ..... so *** it’s giving me hope again?? I mean should I hope all the positive signs are there? But I just can’t open my heart up to it again? Sounds so selfish but it’s so bloody hard watching your parent die I’m only in my 20’s (I’m sure in hurts at any age I’m sorry!) but I feel robbed! It’s such a mix emotion I don’t even now what I’m getting to only that I’m struggling with it all I’m struggling to accept there could maybe be hope again as every time I’ve let myself believe I’ve got further than Christmas with him it back fires on me! Erughhhh. Sorry xx
