My poor Dad has just died. I am really struggling with how much he suffered. Thinking about it is so painful it makes me moan with pain. He had no food or fluids st all for 6 days. No one was concerned re this but I found it unbearable. He was skeletal when he died. He also suffered with intractable violent hiccups which the medical staff were never able to effectively control. He ended up with high doses of haloperidol and midazolam do that he was so sedated he was no longer able to communicate with us and appeared to be in a coma. We talked to him and sometimes his eyes seemed to open but we don’t know if he could still see or hear us. He got hiccups again towards the end and basically they continued, jerking the bed, until he died. His death was the worst suffering I can ever imagine. We helplessly watched this to the end unable to do anything to help or comfort him. How do we bear this? How do we remember him as he once was and not what he became. Please could anyone offer me some crumbs of reassurance or comfort?
