Cancer Research UK on Google+ Cancer Research UK on Facebook Cancer Research UK on Twitter

Let's beat cancer sooner

Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 15:58

I have a busy day and come home to my lovely neighbour mowing my back lawn.  I chastise him and say  I would have got round to it, he knew I was struggling and came in whilst I was out.  These kindnesses make my day.  I think hubby is not looking well and voice my concerns.   Nope he says he's fine but a little niggle tells me otherwise.   I get up this morning and he admits he's not good..  appointment at Doctors and he has another infection.  I am being picked up by a friend to go to Wynyard Hall and gardens, the day is glorious and she has the soft top down,we arrive and I look like Bridget Jones after her ride in an open top car!  We have home made cake and coffee and meander the beautiful gardens looking at the pumpkins, sweetcorn and variety of flowers.  I suddenly spot a flower that hubby and I keep seeing  on our drives and it's driving him insane not knowing its name.  A lady hears us talking, takes a photo, Googles it and walks back to tell me, it's  called the common tansy. People are so thoughtful and kind!  Back home hubby laughs at the state of my hair, saying I look like I have been pulled through a hedge backwards,  charming!!  I tell him the plants name, lovely he says and promptly falls asleep on his sheepskin in the sunny conservatory.   Hopefully the antibiotics will kick in soon, I want my normal hubby back.

Re: Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 18:18 in response to Caz07
Hi Caz Please don't take this the wrong way but why are you starting a new post everyday. Why not update us on the same thread. Good friends and neighbors are such a strength during this journey.

Re: Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 20:24 in response to river56

Probably because I don't know how!  Give me a clue what to do. Caz

Re: Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 20:54 in response to Caz07

Hi Carol,

Sorry to cut in the conversation but I thought I might be able to help if you're having difficulties when replying on the same thread. 

In order to post on the same thread you started, all you need to do is to click on the pink 'reply' button on the right corner of your message. That will create a new post within the thread, for example, if you want to post another message here, you'd click on the button I circled below and then on 'post now':


But if you are still having difficulties,  just click here and send us an email, we'll be happy to try to assist you. Happy

Best wishes,

Renata, Cancer Chat Moderator


Re: Stay Strong

17 Aug 2017 22:09 in response to Moderator Renata

Thanks for that. . I will try it tomorrow.   Carol

Re: Stay Strong

18 Aug 2017 00:17 in response to Caz07

Learn something new every day. If you click on the reply button to this post that will give you a start.

Re: Stay Strong

18 Aug 2017 13:11 in response to river56

So I now know how to use the followed threads!  Pity no one told me weeks ago!!  Anyway the infection is taking its toll and hubby is not on the same planet as me!  We get in the car and his walking stick has gone missing from the four foot from front door to car door.  What have you done with it, me I didn't have it, backs to specs situation again.  We both look around the car, no sign, climb back out and lo and behold it's on the top of the hedge nestling safely in the pretty pink flowers!   Back home, handed key for front door, don't need it because he hasn't locked it, fortunately we have not been burgled!!  I'll take you to town he says but I can see my life flashing before me and decline the offer. Let's wait until the antibiotics kick in. We stay safely in the house and he sleeps the afternoon away.  

Re: Stay Strong

19 Aug 2017 16:20 in response to Caz07

Hubby is not doing well with this infection and is not up to much or interested in anything.  My best friend has gone to Tenerife and we hug before she goes, she has been my rock over the last five months and I shall miss her dearly.  My younger daughter calls, she, son in law and my Harry are off to Greece for their hols and she promises that when Dad is better they want to send us a way for a break.   I don't tell her he has another infection,  spoiling her happiness would be mean.  I wish them all a lovely time,  they have busy lives and deserve the break.   We have no choice but to stay put  and it is hard.  Anyway hubby decided he would get the hospital transport for his radiotherapy,   I say a little prayer of thanks, I think four weeks of his criticism of my driving might be the straw that broke the camel's back!! Curry for tea and some chilled wine, I will miss the Spanish thriller I have watched for the past four weeks! !


Re: Stay Strong

19 Aug 2017 17:10 in response to Caz07
I know your life is on hold during treatment you can't plan ahead. I remember going to the local coop with husband he put the shopping on the checkout then just as the girl was about to start he noticed she had a cold. He put everything back in the trolley apologize saying sorry my wife is having chemo and has to stay away from people with colds. Went to another person I didn't know wether to hide or hug him. As to the Spanish thriller can't you record it or watch it on catch up. Sending this from Austria lucky me here for a week.

Re: Stay Strong

19 Aug 2017 17:56 in response to river56

Have a great time in  Austria , your hubby sounds great, I haven't seen anyone if they are ill! Spanish thriller finished last week,  will miss suspense until next series!  Carol

Re: Stay Strong

20 Aug 2017 16:34 in response to Caz07

I am sat watching rubbish TV for a Saturday night and feeling sorry for myself when the phone rings and it's my older daughter saying can they come and stay before Dad starts radiotherapy.   Yes I say, it would be lovely to have other people here to cheer him up, especially our four year old granddaughter who is a bundle of mischief.   So more food and preparation ready for them arriving.  I have been  neglecting the house because hubby is in it so much!   He hates me hoovering around him and dusting under his nose, it's only when others are coming, you see the floating seeds that attach themselves to everything at this time of the year,  the cobwebs because we live near fields, and the dust from the now dry roads after all the rain.  So my hubby and I are looking forward to having some laughter and fun before the toll of the radiotherapy takes effect. 

Re: Stay Strong

21 Aug 2017 16:32 in response to Caz07

I have been up since 8 am and have just sat down as I write this post,  I must have done the recommended steps today, daughter, grandson and granddaughter arriving tomorrow,  washing done, bathrooms cleaned, lawn mowed, shopping for food and window cleaner been as they were filthy after the roofers had been!!  I have made hubby go out for some fresh air as he has been nowhere for days, I know he is feeling rubbish and is worried about Thursday and radiotherapy but sometimes you get stuck in a rut and need a shove, so I have shoved him!  He is coughing more but it's difficult to know whether it's the cancer or the antibiotics drying his system up.  We don't even know if the tumour has shrunk  more, sInce the end of chemo we seem to have fallen off the radar.  Is that normal I ask myself or are we expecting too much from the NHS?  I am still angry that we had this cough checked out last September and despite all the television and radio adverts telling you to report a persistent cough it took six months before our surgery twigged that it was serious.  What is the point of knowledge if your GP ignores the rules?  I am drinking chilled wine whilst typing this, it is my treat at the end of a busy day,  but it has been worth it if the family cheer him up.  

Re: Stay Strong

22 Aug 2017 11:59 in response to Caz07

Well hubby is not in a a good mood and he is determined to try and spoil my joy at everyone coming and I know that when they arrive he will be happy go lucky!   He has wound me up to such an extent that everything I planned to do has been left because my mind is concentrating on him.  I know he is scared about Thursday and I understand that, it must be terrifying knowing what is coming.  So hopefully they will be here soon and take the onus off me so that I can share the burden with someone else for a change!  I have bought lots of things for the children to do, little handbag from the charity shop for ELLA and a minecraft sticker book for Alfie, some new tennis balls and bat so they can whack them over the eight foot hedge, thank goodness for Boyes, it's so cheap I don't mind them losing them.  Wish me a lovely time!!.   

Re: Stay Strong

24 Aug 2017 10:44 in response to Caz07

Well the family arrive and hubby instantly brightens up.  We decide not to disturb our sleeping arrangements and get the old cot mattress out for Ella and the black and white cow blanket as it has now been named and put it on the floor by my bed,  this means I am awoken at 5.45 am by a little one needing a wee!  She won't back to sleep so I end up downloadin bbc I player for kids so we don't wake the whole house up.  Mummy gets a lie in and by nine O'clock I have already done three hours of playing, feeding and stopping her arguing with her Brother over who has whose I pad!    We take off for the indoor play park with hubby in tow but the weather is terrible so everyone has had the same idea.  Hubby is looking in pain so we all load back into the car and go home for tea and cake! He is now getting worried about today and fears what's to come, so we are staying close today to be there for him when he comes back.  I'll let you know how it goes.

Re: Stay Strong

24 Aug 2017 14:50 in response to Caz07
That maybe why he has not been in a good mood worrying about tomorrow. I thought I was handling everything but my husband said I went very quiet and a bit short tempered before my appointments. He says I still go quiet and cleaning mad just before my 3 monthly check up. Enjoy the family visit.