Hi Gavin,

Really sorry to hear this.  Cancer being gone is very much a misnomer as I imagine you know, but sadly over the years people have been told fallacies like "it's gone" and even "you're cured".  It can be helpful to live as if the cancer is gone, but it's possible to live that way while knowing that it could become an issue at any given time.

Like you my cancer is 'back'.  Different cancer and much shorter time frame for recurrence (just 5 months from finishing chemo and only 2 months from having my surgery).  The hope is to get me back on chemo by the end of next week when I've only just found myself back at work (new job too) and getting settled into 'normal life' again.

Have they said when they're going to start treatment?  I can sympathise with your symptoms as I get those same symptoms as part of another illness so I do really feel for you in that regard, they are very disruptive to life.  But in terms of you being a burden, just don't go there.  We are not burdens.  It is important to remind yourself what you would do if it was your partner in your shoes... I would move heaven and earth for my man if it was him with the cancer, nothing would be too much trouble. It's important for us to encourage our partners to rest of course, and to make sure they have people other than us to talk to about the situation, but just think how you would feel if the situation was reversed.  We aren't burdens, even though it's easy to feel like that.

Let me know about your treatment plan etc.  Here if you want to talk.

LJ

A lovely post TwinTwo that sums it up, especially about not being a burden to our loved ones. Well said. You are an inspiration to us all.

C x

Hi Gavin

You are going through so much and I bet your partner is not giving a hoot about the housework! Please know you are loved and imagine if your partner was ill and how you would react. TwinTwo has put it in a nutshell in her post. Sending hugs to you x

Thank you all for your reply and words of encouragement, I know my partner doesn’t see me as a burden but like you say it doesn’t stop you feeling like it, good news my neck isnt as painful now im healing well after they removed a gland from my neck, and my specialist has me booked in for a pet scan next wed so ill be radioactive for a few hours lol then clinic with my specialist on Friday to hopefully discuss treatment