So sorry to hear how things are for you and your Mum at the moment [@Nikkiniks]‍ I will tell you not to worry but i know you will anyway, it seems to be in our nature to do so.

I am in pretty much the same situation as your Mum at the moment except that i am a bit younger and am slightly further along the line than your Mum is with regards to, i have had the PET scan and i have my next appointment to see the lung specialist in 10 days time to discuss what those results were and what happens next ... if anything.

I'm afraid that other than offering you a gentle but heartfelt hug then i can't do much to alleviate your fears but i will say again ... please please try not to worry because after each stage of x rays, appointments, ct scans, pet scans, biopsies, all we do is worry and it is wasted energy, worrying won't ever change the outcome of these tests and it doesn't half sap your energy which may well be needed for other things. 

I have tried to keep myself busy around the house and garden to keep my mind off of it and sometimes it works but sometimes it doesn't but when it doesn't, i try to throw myself into something else. I have finally gotten round to doing jobs in the house that have been needing doing for yonks and i don't think my house has ever been cleaner.

Please let us know how things go for your Mum, i hope and pray that it all works out for you both.

PJ. x

Hi, thank you so much for your reassurance, we are now waiting for mums PET scan to come through, it’s the awful waiting and not knowing that is mentally draining.  She has resigned herself to the decision that she believes she now has lung cancer due to the 3 stone weight loss in under a year and a chronic cough that won’t go away, her constant lethargy and a pain in her shoulder (the same side as the shadow), I just hope to god it all turns out to be something less severe, but I think I am ready to deal with what comes our way, only awful thing is that it could be weeks yet

Unfortunately for everyone, it does take weeks and as the prospective patient or relative it does drag you down mentally and physically. I have also resigned myself to that same fact too but oddly enough i have only been in pain since all my tests started (i think) and at times i think i'm imagining them, except for today when i was in so much pain that i was crying.

 You can see by reading the new posts on this site every day  just how widespread this disease is and while we wish we could get all the different departments to hurry their 'rses up with our results, sadly they can't because there are just not enough trained professionals to decipher and read those results. The ratio of trained staff to patients must be virtually non existent.

While you think you may be ready to deal with everything Nikkiniks, i don't think any of us are ever truly ready and it hits us like  a ton of bricks when or if we hear that news, we can only deal it with it as it comes and that is the very best we can do.

I sincerely hope that for your Mum and myself and all of the people who are worried that it does turn out to be something less serious.

Take care sweetie and i wish you both, all the best.

PJ

Thank you, she’s flown back to her holiday home to be with my dad in Spain, today, I rang the hospital to find out how long PET scan would be coming through but they said we were given wrong information and she will be referred to the Respiratory Team who will decide if a PET scan or Biopsy is best way forward, she promises me she will fly back as soon as appt comes through, it has been fast tracked but they said 2 or 3 week wait even fasttracked xx

Well Nikki, she is better off over in Spain to be honest. At least if she and your Dad are together then they can support each other. I think it was roughly 2 weeks for my PET scan appointment but yes, it was the respitory doctor who decided on that next step for me although my appointment for the respitory clinic came in very quickly, in a matter of days actually but i hope your Mum gets a little me time in Spain before she has to come back for that. 

Please keep me updated Nicky, it's all new for both of us and i genuinly am interested to hear how your Mum gets on because we are at similar stages.

PJ

Of course I will keep you posted, it’s really nice to speak to a person instead of googling over and over again all her symptoms, it’s driving me nuts every night before I go to sleep, trying to kid myself it’s something else, on the plus side she’s not coughing up blood, and she doesn’t have chest pain, but she’s lost so much weight since February her bones are literally sticking through her clothes on her back, she has no energy and she has no muscle left anywhere on her body, and she has a horrendous cough but not continuous, no cough at night tho xx 

Sorry if I keep repeating myself and going over old ground xx

I’m so sorry that you have been in pain lately, looking at your profile your only 31 aren’t you, ? That’s awful if it is the dreaded C, for anyone I know, but so so young, can I ask if you are an ex smoker ? My mum is still smoking but trying hard to quit, she did give up a few times but we lost my only sibling, my brother 3 years ago, aged 39 so she started again xx 

Nicky i have sent you a friend request if you wanted to chat elsewhere but please don't feel obligated to accept it. I don't mind and i am happy to talk here also. 

And don't worry about repeating yourself, you are scared and feel lost, confused and alone, i am too but i feel less alone in the few weeks i have been here

I wish i was only 31 but you can add another 21 years on to that, lol.

Actually i'm not an ex smoker , i still smoke but i have quit in the past  but never for any more than a few months, i always went back to them. Even these last few days, i have been trying and didn't have a *** for 3  days, today is a different story and whether it's because i have a lot of pain today the first thing i reached for was a ***, a bit like like a comfort blanket.

When i smoke i say to myslef f**k it, the damage is done but i know logically that that's not absolutely true. If i have lung cancer then my options are slightly more limited because i have COPD but that doesn't mean that they can't offer me anything so i really should be giving myself the best possible chance by quitting but like your Mum, it's very very hard to achieve that.

The people on here, cancer patients  past and present and there families have a wealth of knowledge and when i first posted on here a few lovely ladies replied to me and told me that there are options. 3 weeks ago i thought i would be dead by now but that was the fear that gripped me and past experiences of other family members. Things have moved on enormously since then so i still have some hope that i am clinging on to and we all need hope.

When you said your Mum had gone to Span, i was slightly jealous, not in a bad way but i have 2 trips planned and i don't think i will be able to go on them but hey ho, it is what ot is i suppose. Hopefully there will be plenty more time for holidays to Spain.

Slightly off topic but where has your Mum gone ? Tell her not to bring fags back with her, lol.

PJ

Will try and message you on private bit x