Am very recently widowed, husband was very fit and healthy ( or so we thought),non-smoker, very occasional drinker, loved running, going to the gym, cycling to work 12 miles and had done a couple of marathons, so to suddenly get a diagnosis of a retroperitoneal sarcoma with metastases of liver and lung.....our world just fell apart !! He lived for just 7 weeks from diagnosis. Am on bereavement leave from work at the moment, having some counselling, but I'm not sure how I get through this. I feel lost without him, everything feels scary, am having panic attacks if I do venture out the front door, so most of the time I stay home, I try to stay busy but am always in floods of tears, I know he's gone, but it still feels like a bad dream. Sleep has become an escape for me, I do it a lot in the daytime, so I don't have to think. Feeling also that he was failed badly by some medical professionals, basically just given an option to either stay in hospital or go home, and once home, nothing.....no support from anyone medically, no info on who to contact/turn to for help or support. Drs not sending referrals for chemo treatment after advising us they would. Only after chasing up discovered a referral hadn't been made after 2 weeks of waiting. So his 1st chemo was administered 6 weeks after diagnosis, nurses at the cancer hospital remarked on how poorly he looked when we wheeled him in.....the look of shock on their face when we told them it was his 1st treatment, they couldn't believe it!! Just to add, we never saw an actual "cancer" Dr until 6 days before he passed away.....surely that can't be right !!?? Just really struggling with life atm
