Hi Skyrock,

Welcome to the forum, although I’m sure that you would rather be anywhere else but here.

I am so sorry to hear about your Mum’s diagnosis. It is so difficult to be the strong one when your Mum, has been given a diagnosis of lung cancer. It is twenty years since I lost my Mum to metastases in liver, lungs, bones and brain. She initially started off with breast cancer and had a mastectomy. She lived for 12 years after this, and it was only in her last year that we discovered the metastases. This was absolutely heart-breaking to deal with. It is so hard to watch a loved one deteriorate before your eyes.

Dealing with the fact that you are likely to lose your Mum is a terrifying thought. Instead of doing this, try to cope with things day-by-day. The bigger picture is just too much to deal with. If she is well enough, try to make your Mum as comfortable as possible. See if there is anywhere that she would like to visit or people she may want to see? Try to help out with housework, washing and ironing, preparing  tasty and nutritous meals, etc. Let her know how much you love her – we don’t tell our families this often enough.

Try to make memories with her or sit and chat to her, read to her, play music or even watch television together. Your Mum will probably already feel very tired at times and is likely to feel even more tired if she starts chemo.

Do you have family or siblings of your own, who can support you through this? You will find that you will get the strength from somewhere to cope with this difficult time.

Please keep in touch and let us know how you are both getting on. Remember, that we are always here whenever either of you feel like talking.

I hope that tomorrow goes as well as it can.

Kind regards,

Jolamine xx

Today went better than expected my mum is going to have chemotherapy treatment to hopefully give her more time, and shrink the tumour without this she has months or less as it's a very aggressive cancer, feeling very numb and a little lost at the moment, not sure what am feeling.

my concern is the chemotherapy is going to make mum very poorly, cause I feel she will refuse to carry on with the treatment.

any advice as what to expect ??

Hi Skyrock,

I am glad that today's visit went better than expected.  Did they tell you when she is going to start chemo?

If your Mum has problems with the chemo, they can change to a different and maybe less-invasive form of chemo. I do hope that she can cope with this treatment and that it slows dorn the rate of growth in her tumours.

Stay strong. I thinking of and praying for you both.

Jolamine xx

My mum is quite weak at the moment and is having a 2 weeks course of strong steroids, to encourage eating and build strength up. The type of cancer she has makes you feel very unwell straight away apparently, mum not been eating and very tired and fatigue all the time. Hopefully after this they will begin, starting with 4 lots of chemo 3 weeks apart, then another scan to see if it is effective, if it is she then having some radiotherapy going to be a long 3 months but aleast  my mum is still here, for how long am unsure thank you for replying x

Hello Skyrock,

The steroids should help to give your Mum some appetite.It is difficult to eat when you are not feeling well.

The tiredness will probably get worse with chemo and food can taste metallic which won't help with her eating. I still have the fatigue and I was first diagnosed with breast cancer 7 years ago. Let her sleep when she needs to. If her exhaustion is anything like mine,she just has to give in to it.

I know that this is a trying time for both of you and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Jolamine xx

Hello, my mum had 4 rounds of chemo and it wasn't as bad as we all thought. Yes she was very tired but still managed to do things. The steroids also helped and she started to gain weight after taking them. 

If I can give you any advice it would be spend as much time with your mum as possible, take lots of photos and maybe some videos if you can bear it.

hope will keep you going and the need to be strong for your mum xx