Hello, I hope someone can understand how I feel after I lost my husband three weeks ago. He had cancer of the pharanx and suffered for a year and a half. We has been married for over 30 years and were very happy. I am heartbroken and, though blessed with friends and family I live alone now. When my father died, I felt he was always with me, guiding as I helped my mother cope and just there for me to talk to. I thought that widowhood would be like that. My husband would still be with me. But I have really lost him, can't find him or feel his presence anywhere. I used to think I saw my dad on the street, the same thing happened when people I knew died. Sometimes out of the corner of my eye I would see them. It was always a trick of the eye of course but it was strangely comforting. But not a sign of my dear husband who I loved more than anyone. The grief at times is overwhelming.