Partners mum has stage 4

Hello, I’m just posing to get a bit of advice here.

My partners mum has stage 4 breast cancer. We have just recently found this out as we were both under the impression that she was getting better. We don’t know much information about it all as she didn’t want my partner to worry about her but he will be going to a dr ap with her in a month or so. 

The reason I’m posting is I’m just at a bit of a loss of how to comfort him well. I’m a bit of an emotional person and I can’t seem to talk to him  about it without me crying and getting upset because I love his mum and I also hate seeing him so upset as well. I just don’t want him to feel like he has to comfort me when it should be the other way round.

Does anyone have any advise on how I can be better and controlling my emotions and how best to comfort him. 

Thank you.

  • Hi there ...

    Well what an amazing wife / daughter in law you are ... l think when early in diagnosis everyone is in shock ... it makes us run round like headless chickens ... panic, feeling scared, crying / confused are a few of the emotions .. but looking back, I got all my emotions out .. till I was Cryed out ... then my daughter in law sat us down and said, no more panicing ... no more "what ifs" well take every problem as and when it comes up... and well do it together. .

    Once we took that on board, we all coped far better ... your mother in law has a difficult road ahead .. so the more you all pull together, the better you cope .. but you know we shared many a tear ... it's o.k to all admit it's scary .. some men find they try to be strong , coz that's how they are brought up ... but the more he opens up the better .. l know my son was in bits in the early days .. but you know that's o.k ...

    You all need to do this any way you can ... sharing feeling will help .. there's lots of us breast cancer lasses on here ... all different grades and stages ... all different treatments ... this is a great place to come for support ... we KNOW because weve been there ...

    Sending you a vertual hug. . Chrissie xx