Hi Bella 

welcome to the forum, you have certainly been through it

i am no counsellor doctor or agony aunt (uncle I suppose), but it looks like it's time to look after number one.

even when you were going through cancer, you kept it from your husband because you were thinking of him and not yourself

its never easy when we need support from a close one and it does not manifest itself and this causes more problems in its own way.

you husband has now left and although in a way, your responsibility to look after him and his depression has gone too....although you sound a caring person and that might not be the totally true

its time to look after yourself, you have benn looking after your husband for too long without a level of acceptable reciprocal support, now someone else has that burden and you are free of it,

concentrate on doing something positive for yourself and making you feel good (worrying about your husband is not included in that)

as I said, I am no expert, but being a cancer survivor I know how important it is to be positive about yourself and making the most of everything.

sounds like you have been given a fresh new chance in many ways, go grab it with both hands

Vatch