Needing help / information.

Hi,

Earlier this week I found out that my mum has pancreatic cancer...  she hid the truth from my sister and I for a few days but we both had gut instincts that something was seriously wrong.

 

she is having a major operation soon to take away part of her pancreas, gall bladder and bowels.

My parents are trying to reassure us but as they never told us of the full extent of her illness earlier, we are fearful that mum is still trying to protect us.

i know very little about the condition but everything I read appears to have a very poor prognosis.

I feel in a daze and lost.  I keep thinking back to all the times I was mean to her, and how I could’ve been a better daughter...  I keep thinking to myself, this will be the last birthday she has....

 

I need real facts on the disease, I need to be prepared for the future.  If anyone could help I’d appreciate it massively.  Friends tell me she’ll be fine but in my gut I don’t think she will survive....

 

Thank you...... xxx

  • Hello Scarlett92, welcome to the forum.  I am sorry about your mum's diagnosis. I don't have any personal knowledge of pancreatic cancer but am copying the information from this website which may be helpful if you have not seen it.  It's beginning to get late at night now but someone else may be able to come and give you some more information.

    www.cancerresearchuk.org/.../pancreatic-cancer

    I am also attaching a link to Pancreatic Cancer UK which I hope will be of use. 

    www.pancreaticcancer.org.uk/

    Best wishes.  Annie

  • Thank you for your help Annie, I really appreciate it.  xxx

  • Hi Scarlett92,

    I'm sorry about your mum's problems and how it's affecting the family. As a mum myself, when I had a serious dignosis, it took me a few days to get my head around things. I wasn't trying to hide anything from our sons, it just took a short while to have more news myself so I could explain it to them, rather than giving half a story and not being able to answer their questions.

    Maybe ask your parents to be open with you if you'd find it easier to cope that way. But often patients are waiting for news themselves. They need time to adjust to the situation.

    Whatever you think you may have done in the past,you have the chance to speak to your mum now. I'd bet she doesn't even remember some things you feel bad a about. No need to go into detail,perhaps  just say sorry if I ever upset you.

    I don't know much about pancreatic cancer, but I do know mums appreciate a hug, a hand to hold, a thoughtful message. 

    Kind regards, gamechanger

  • Thank you for your reply, it’s honestly been really helpful at helping me understand my mums situation.

     

    Thank you for your kind words. xxx