Hello Hilts,

Cancer treatment and surgery have both improved enormously since 1988. Of course an oesophagectomy is still a major procedure, and no-one would wish it on anyone, but you can take your consultant's words at face value when he says he is looking at a curative outcome.

If you can become more positive, it will make it much easier to talk to your daughter about this. Children can be more robust than we expect, if you focus on the more positive aspect that the treatment is being done to get rid of the cancer that is your husband's unwanted guest. Children pick up on the anxiety around them, rather than just on the words they hear, so as you process your husband's diagnosis and it becomes less of a nightmare to you, it will also make it easier for your daughter to cope.

Wishing you all the best.

Thank you so much for coming back.

yes, the consultant is very positive about the whole thing, but the catastrophisiser (sic) in me is hard at work.

absolutly for sure, my daughter has picked up on the underlying anxiety here. We have told her that daddy has some nasty ulcers that need shrinking and then removing. She seemed happy with this, but I think still waters run deep as she keeps saying she has a sore throat, stiff neck, and countless other complaints that she does not have, that is probably more distressing than the actual diagnosis .