Together we will beat cancer


My husband passed away

29 Dec 2017 13:48

My husband passed away from cancer

He tried everything he could.He wanted to be healthy, he fought this terrible terminal disease. We were together on this. Now I feel the grief and sorrow that I felt  before he left us , even stronger. The why and how I could of help him more.  After 34 years with my soulmate, now I feel completely along. I now God is with me. Where is my soulmate, I miss him all the time. It's just hard.

Re: My husband passed away

29 Dec 2017 13:56 in response to Ginaandme

I'm so sorry to welcome you to the forum under such sad circumstances and on behalf of the moderation team I would like to offer you our sincerest and heartfelt condolences on the passing of your husband.

I can't begin to imagine how difficult this must be for you right now, especially having been together for so long, but I wanted to assure you that you are not alone. Many members here are also coping with the grief of losing a loved one and I'm sure some of them will reply soon to offer their support and advice.

I have included some information about coping with grief which I hope will be of some help to you at this time Ginaandme but keep chatting to us when you can and we will do all we can to help you through.

Kind regards, 

Steph, Cancer Chat Moderator

Re: My husband passed away

29 Dec 2017 14:27 in response to Moderator Steph

Thank you so much. I read  every day coping with grief, but I feel so much hurt, pain, loss within me. Our good memories help me at times, but I miss him so much.

Re: My husband passed away

29 Dec 2017 15:44 in response to Ginaandme

Hi Ginaand me - welcome to the forum.

So sorry to read about the recent loss of your husband to this terrible disease.

Try not to wonder about what you might have done differently, you did your best and no-one can ask for more. What works for one patient has no benefit for another and there seems to be a lot of random luck involved.

Sometimes there is nothing anyone can do to prevent our loved ones from dying and that is often very hard to accept. My Mum believed her own death was God's will and she took comfort from that belief during her final days. 

Best wishes



Re: My husband passed away

29 Dec 2017 16:28 in response to Ginaandme

So sorry you are suffering so much and also beating yourself up because you feel you did something wrong.  I am with davek on this one; you did your very best and nobody could have done more.  I think we have all had questions after a loved one has died - should I have done this, said that but really I think it doesn't  matter very much when the love you bear your partner is shown in your daily actions.  There is no time limit on grieving but try to be kinder to yourself.  As you say it is very hard.

Re: My husband passed away

29 Dec 2017 18:42 in response to Ginaandme

I'm sorry to hear the passing of your husband