Hi Maz,

Sorry for your loss, I feel your pain as I lost my sister end of May to this awful disease! and I still cannot believe she is no longer here, my heart bleeds every single day, She was my best friend, and life is just not the same without her. The pain is just so tragic to bear both emotionally and mentally, I’m undergoing counselling at the moment that I’m finding is helping in some way, I hope you can find the strength somehow to get thru this in some sort of way in time. They say with time it gets abit easier. Take Care. Sending you hugs xxx 

Thank you so much for replying. I’m thinking about counselling as well as I need help in handling this I think. It’s so quick that I haven’t had time to catch up with all that’s happened. 

Sorry to hear about you losing your sister. Do you have family support? My children are helping me but to be honest, I just want my husband back. 

Thank you again for replying, xxxx

Hello there let me say first ime so sorry.what i can say is your not alone on here i had the same in my case liz had first chemo monday massive stroke friday morning and died of sepsis 4 am sunday morning and it totaly shocked me to the core i felt all thoes feeling .but ime less than four months on but ime not in that all pervading agony even thats a poor word for it your so early on but you have done the right thing trying to get some answers and the answer is yes the pain does go you will not feel like this forever we all griev diffrently and the time varies you may here people say they are the same three years later it helps no one hearing that but most are not but you have to just keep thinking it will not hurt like this forever i will get through this be with your famly and friends love from otheres rubs off keep eating stay away from alcohol and eventualy the pain will change just because the pain goes dosnt mean you love and miss them less .ime sorry if i seem a bit cold but ime trying to give you hope you will not be like this forever .so  ime so sorry but try and keep going baby steps .paul ps if it gets so bad theres the samartans .cruz bereavment help and support line they will listen and give you advice.theres the macmillan and marie currie help lines they will help you try and find out any answers you will want answereing as they have nurses that will be only to glad to answer .medical questions. And the local hospices have bereavment councilers i went within a week of losing like you the love of my life i think thats why ime moving through much quicker all these are free and numbers on the internet there are so many kind people out there wanting to help you just need to ask.

So sorry to read this xx 

I lost my Mum (a few years back now) only three weeks after she was diagnosed with cancer so I can understand some of the pain you are going through...although I know it is a different love when it comes to partners xx

If you are like me, you’d be still coming to terms with the diagnosis, never mind him sadly passing away :( xx 

I was in a really bad place when this happened and so accessed some counselling through work. The most helpful session was when they showed me the grief cycle (Google will help) and 1) I could see where I was on it and 2) I could see that there was an end in sight. 

You will get through this xx I think for me it was about going through the process to healing and having faith that things would feel ok in the end. 

I know this isn’t for everyone...but my GP prescribed me a temporary medication for the initial days and weeks after losing her - it was great but I can’t remember the name. It really, really took the edge off without making me feel completely numb. 

So sorry again xx hang in there xx ps I wonder if there are any bereavement groups around where you live so you can connect with others in the know. If not, you could start one yourself when you’re feeling a bit better xx

Thank you for your quick reply. So sorry to hear of your own loss. It will have been two weeks tomorrow and I miss him every second. Xx

Thank you for replying so quickly. So sorry to hear of your loss. My family are supporting me, making me eat. I’ve bern keeping away from alcohol as you suggested as I need to go through this process, I don’t want to numb it with alcohol and find I still have to go through this later. I don’t want to be here but know I have no choice. I love my husband so very much and was proud to be his wife. Xx

Thank you for your reply, it helps to know others feel as I do and have struggled. It’s been almost 2 weeks  now and I miss him every second of every day. I don’t want to be here but know I have no choice. Xx

My heart breaks for you, Mazda xx 

You have so much love for your husband xx 

I think sometimes it really is a case of getting through the next minutes or hours and that’s ok. I can recall saying something similar myself. “I don’t know how I’m going to get through the next minute, never mind the whole day”...but somehow we manage to do it xx 

I also recall a time when I lost my Mum and a colleague who had lost his wife told me that there would come a time when I would look back at memories of my Mum and having feelings of happiness and joy and even laughter. I didn’t believe him...but that was true. The initial stages of loss were crippling for me...I was all over the place and caused concern amongst my friends and colleagues but I realise now that this stage was temporary and although it will always be sad, when I think of my Mum now, it isn’t like a knife through the heart like it was in the early days xx 

Mazda if you haven’t already, please check out some bereavement services or groups in your area xx when you are ready you may find it helpful to be around others who are going through the same xx 

I’d bet your husband would be so proud of you for hanging in there xx 

Thank you so much for your reply. It is helpful to hear other people’s stories. I just can’t imagine living my life without him, he was everything to me and we adored each other. I hate getting up every morning. 

Hi sorry your so hurt, my mum died last Thursday the 6th my dad died about two years prior to this and my sister of only 18 died in 1985. I am now 47! All I can say is live on for your children your there rock even thou you don’t want to be. It’s gonna be hard but like my mum always used say “he only gives you what you can handle” she wasn’t religious but she was a very strong woman. I am the fourth of five three sister a younger brother. Like I said your children need you you must go on. Hugs to you all x