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My Dad passed away 3 weeks ago.

19 Oct 2019 19:21

I lost my Dad three weeks ago. I am trying to learn how to grieve. I am looking for methods that might work for me. The last three weeks have gone by so fast I’m worried I’ve missed a crucial stage of the grieving process. Most of the time I feel numb. Sometimes I’m scared, sometimes sad, sometimes motivated, sometimes angry. He was diagnosed with cancer three years ago so I had time to ‘prepare’ but I don’t know how to grieve and cope now that he’s gone. 

My Dad passed away 3 weeks ago.

19 Oct 2019 19:56 in response to Jph23

Hi,

First of all, sorry for the loss of your dad. It's such a painful time. I lost my mum suddenly 4 months ago and completely understand.

Secondly, why do you think you arent grieving? Grieving comes in all sorts of ways. Crying, screaming, staring into space, working all the hours under the sun, searching non stop posts online, drinking endless amounts of alcohol. 

I am assuming you mean that you arent spending all day crying but grieving doesnt have to be that. You have quite rightly pointed out that you are so busy. The first few weeks are a blur of activity, notifying friends and family, arranging a funeral, dealing with coroners, hospitals etc. 

After the funeral it really hits and for me, 4 months on, I have no idea how to cope with losing my mum. Sometimes I'm crying, sometimes I'm angry, sometimes I feel guilty. If I occasionally laugh I quickly berate myself for briefly enjoying myself when my mum has lost her life.

I just get through each days as it comes and hope the next one will be better than the one before.

Dont be hard on yourself, it's such early days x