Hello everyone, 

I've never actually posted on here before but I have found much solace in the many messages. I've been reading them more and more over the past few weeks. My Dad was diagnosed in Summer 2017 and has put an extremely brave fight, but about a month ago we got the news no one wants to receive: "the chemo isn't working and you're being referred to palliative care". To say it was heartbreaking, would be a massive understatement.

My dad is only 56 and I know I'm biased, but he's honestly the kindest, most loyal, human being I've ever known. But, then again, I know cancer doesn't discriminate. Knowing that he'll be gone soon is tearing me up inside. I'm so sad about all the things he'll miss out on and all the suffering he's endured over the past 16 months. Seeing him deteriorate day by day is heartbreaking and I can't even begin to imagine how incredibly sad and scared he must be. I'm trying very hard to appreciate every second and to remember him the way he used to be: fun, happy and full of life.

I'm so sorry for everyone else here who's in the same situation as we are. We've been "lucky" as we've gone through it together as a family and my dad has had the best care. I hope no one here has had to go through it alone. 

I'm angry, heartbroken and incredibly scared about living in a world without my dad.