My Dad has lung cancer.

Hi,

Recently found out my Dad has lung cancer. I am finding it very hard to deal with.

I dont see my family often but never thought, as everyone does, that this would happen to my Dad.

I feel so guilty at how I feel and so anxious about what is to come.  I dont know the specifics of my Dads diagnosis and he doesnt seem to want to talk about it which only makes me worry more. 

Any advice would be appreciated.

  • Hi there millie... please don't feel guilty ... having a cancer diagnosis affects everyone who loves them , and you being away from home, probably is even harder ... that could be why he's not telling you everything ... maybe he's trying to protect you ... maybe you could write a letter to him, and explain just how worried you are because not knowing is harder then facing the truth ...

    He is probably coming to terms with it himself... when I heard the word cancer I stayed in bed for a couple of days and didn't want to see anyone ... but that helped me get my mind around it all, and then I was ready to let family in and because I felt strong. it helped them to walk on this journey with me ... supporting every thing I wanted to do and they held my hand through tests , Dr's appointments and my mastectomy... I'm 4 months post op now and still here .. treatment has come a long way ... so your support will mean a lot ... he's here now, so make the most of every day ... hold his hand and let him know whatever happens you will be there for him ... phone calls and loving texts will help him ... 

    So take care of your heart and know you are braver then you think ... chrisie xx 

  • Hi Chrisie,

    Firstly thanks for your kind words! I appreciate it! 

    I have asked my Dad to get a second opinion as they dont seem to want to do treatment until the cancer is worse. This seems mad to me. 

    This whole situation is rubbish and I am finding it hard to think about other things. Esp when at work. But then again the guilt from these feeling re-emerge.

    Alot of what you have said makes sense so thanks again and glad you are doing well! 

  • Hi Milly.

    I am in a very similar situation.  My dad told me on Tuesday this week that he has stage 4 lung cancer at the age of 60.  Like your father, he doesnt seem to want to talk about it and even his own wife is somewhat in the dark.

    He has been noticably unwell for the past few months, and he only told me because he also works for me and told me he needs time off for Radiotherapy.  

    I've had a lump in my throat ever since i found out and the shock floored me.  The future looks very uncertain right now.

    I hope you know you're not alone and my thoughts are with you during this difficult time.

     

  • You too Daniel! Its sucha  horrible situation and i understand that parents feel like they want to protect there kids but being in the dark in my case is making it harder! 

    Hopefully our Dads will feel like they are able to share more with us soon.