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My dad has got terminal pancreatic cancer

JLT1971
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My dad was diagnosed in February with incurable pancreatic cancer it has spread to his liver. I live near my mum & dad and my one sibling my brother lives 140 miles away. I have a really tough job 2 kids and a mega busy life and am finding it hard to support my mum. She is struggling to deal with my dads deteriorating psychological state. His symptoms are that he has got a very swollen abdomen which is uncomfortable. He is on Oxycodone slow release tablets 15mg twice a day. He is having palliative chemotherapy. My dad is 73 and my mum is 70. They have run their own business for 40 years and still work now. My husband has recently taken over the business so that is taking the strain off my parents. I am dreading what is to come, the deterioration. It's heartbreaking. What are your experiences of this dreadful disease? 

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    Hi my mum 67 was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer in June 2015, with mets to liver. Prognosis was bleak - she could not have surgery and was placed on pallative chemo. After 9 rounds of pallative chemo mets had disappeared from her liver and the Tumor had shrunk by 80% - to date it has laid dormant - but to us dormancy is as good as remission. We take each day a step at a time. Some are positive and upbeat - some are the pits - but remember all you can do is try your best - I have told my story as we come on here looking for hope and inspiration X - forgot to add - I live near my mum - she still works fulltime and my brother lives far away - you will find strength x

  • Offline in reply to kt9
    Hello! Reading the leading post to this thread, I thought someone was writing my story. The only difference is, my dad chose not to have treatment.....and I live 220 miles away with a young child and a full time job. My sister lives 80 miles away from them, but also has a full time job. My dad was diagnosed with pancreatic ca and liver mets in March. He was given 6-12 months, but I can't see him hanging around until September. The decline hasn't been linear. But, to cut a long story short, he was an active 71 year old and is now in a hospice, jaundiced, confused and if he knew what was going on, he would be mortified. It has been, approximately, 9 weeks since diagnosis. I am sorry that my post isn't one of hope or help, but it is a comfort to know that we are not alone and that we can reach out to platforms such as this and support each other. Mx
  • Offline in reply to MarieMcc
    Hi my dad was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in February and has spread to his liver we have been told it's not curable but up to now he has only seen a doctor once and had a biopsy done today and now we have to wait 10 days for results he has had no treatment yet just given codine for the pain I don't understand why there have not started chemo there know it's cancer what is the biopsy going to say it's been 3month since diagnosis just more time for it to spread and I am so scared for the near future I don't know what to expect in the next few months
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    Hi my mum was diagnosed in Dec with pancreatic cancer that had spread to her liver,she was fitted with a stent from her liver which stopped the jaundice and the acid build up. She decided not to have chemo as she wanted to  enjoy her remaining time and was advised it wouldnt really give her much more time. Since then she has lost weigh and felt in pain from trapped gas ,but since going on a small dose of steriods 4 weeks ago she has stopped losing weight and is eating normal again and has lots of energy,she doesnt have any pain. she has a very positive attitude which i believe is whats keeping her going.We have all talked openly about the cancer and her death,and she has sorted eveything out concerning life after she has gone. She is 70 and my dad has supported her with all her wishes.my brother lives far away so i try and spend as much time as i can with them .

    keep strong.

  • Offline in reply to kt9
    Hi, please can you let me know what chemo your mum was on? X
  • Offline in reply to natsimp

    HI , my mum never had chemo,shes just making the most of the time she has with no treatment. Its been 15 months now and still going strong.

     

    Regards

     

    angela

     

  • Offline in reply to Angela13

    My dad has just been diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. It spread to dudenom and liver. He had an internal bleed and we nearly lost him but docs saved his life that’s before the diagnosis. Possibly starting chemo next week but naturally he’s worried about side effects as all the family are. He was such an outdoorsy out all the time person. Hes understandably depressed and finding it difficult. Life has been turned upside down in 3 weeks. Trying to stay positive and looking for peoples experiences. My brother and I visit often. I’m unsure what the prognosis is and not really sure I want to know he already survived the odds, so we know he’s strong

  • Offline in reply to kt9

    hi, this is the most positive thing I have read reguarding pancreatic cancer, my dad was diagnosed December (2018) and starts his first round of chemo today, is your mothers still dormant ? Xx

  • Offline in reply to lausey

    Hi, 

    My mum passed away is October,It was very quick,she wasnt in pain and only went down hill a couple of days before she passed. She was at home and still talking to us an hour before she died.

     

    kind regards xx

  • Offline in reply to Angela13

    I’m so very sorry for your loss, im so glad she wasn’t in any pain and pasted peacefully. My dads chemo has been postponed as he developed jaundice the morning he was due to start and had the stent put in the following day, we are waiting for the date to start chemo we just want time as much time as possible with him it’s so devastating sending lots of love your way and I’m sure your mom is with you in spirit xxxx

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