Mum's been recalled after mammogram

Hi

I'm very sorry if this is the wrong forum to post this in, but I needed to talk please.  Mum went for routine mammogram but has been recalled.  She told me last night. The appointment is today and I'm off to work (my father is semi retired so he has gone with her).

I'm terrified and although I know all the stats and how unlikely cancer diagnosis is etc, it doesn't stop me thinking the worst.   

I also feel terrible because she and dad have known for a week already and they didn't tell me because they didn't want me to worry.  I'm a terrible worrier so I'm grateful but on the other hand, I also feel guilty they've been shouldering this concern so long and kept up a cheerful face.

I just want to get through today at work. Mum has decided she won't tell me til tonight because if it's good news.. great but also if it's bad news she doesn't want to tell me over the phone (fair enough!)  

I messaged a friend last night and her sole support was "I'm sorry hun".   Thanks.... really helpful. Good to know you're there when I REALLY need you. 

Anyway yes... I don't know what I'm asking for but any advice I guess on getting through today without completely breaking down in the office would be appreciated. 

Thanks x

  • Hello love,

    its pointless me telling  you not to worry....you will! It's good your at work, I hope at least you have a few distractions? 

    The recall may be as simple as they didn't get good images on the first one, this I believe is pretty common.

    If a lump is found they may well want to do an ultrasound and a biopsy, this is routine....as you know not every lump is cancer....the results can take up to another 2 weeks.

    Try not to overthink it...difficult I know! Please keep us updated? I have everything crossed your mum will be ok....xxxx

  • Just checking this reply thing works. I just posted a reply and it vanished!

  • Hi Marlyn 

    Thanks for your reply and encouragement.  It's not the first time she's been recalled - and thankfully that one was clear.  Work is helping I think... certainly better than sitting and stewing alone at home.  But also amazing how petty the usual work issues seem when you're staring down this dark unknown.   

    Mum's appt was about 2 hrs ago now... can't decide if it's better or not for me to not know until I'm home but that was her call to make. Im just glad she has dad with her.

    Will keep you posted for sure.  Thanks again

  • Yes, defo wait until tonight, the breast clinic can be hectic and she may well still be there, when I went I was there for the entire morning! 

  • True... you never know with waiting times.  I just had to up and leave the office for a cry in the loos.  The silence and keyboard tapping was driving me nuts.  I can't care about work today.   What does it matter if i finish the spreadsheet really? What does any of it matter when this is hanging over us?

  • I totally understand, my mum was diagnosed with breast cancer when I was 24, it completely floored me but I'm happy to report her treatments were successful, she has since passed away but with a different health issue and she was 79...,

    I too am having successful treatments for breast cancer....so the worse case scenarios do have good outcomes......your yet to find out about your mum and its natural to think the worse......I have everything crossed....( even my eyes) lol x

  • Thank you Marlyn and I'm really sorry to hear about your own situation . So glad to hear the treatments are working though!  I'm on the way home now.. tried not to cry walking through town.  Failed completely.   Mum has been texting sounding quite cheerful all day although she's not said how the appt actually went.  Work has been bearable at best.  I guess it's just a case of facing the music now.  I daren't even start hoping that her cheerful tone of text is a hint of good news.  

  • Let me know? She will be fine...either way it will be ok...x

  • Ok so.... Mum and I have been talking a lot since she got home. It's not definitely cancer... infact it probably isn't. But they've found a tiny speck of something they suspect to be a micro "calcification" and to be on the safe side have biopsied it.

    I feel a bit calmer for having talked properly and at least now know where things stand.  Id be lying if i said i wasnt still worried but I can't be a panicked wreck for the next 2 weeks while we wait for results... even I haven't got that kind of stamina!   So I'm going to try and be the proper calm grown up i definitely need to be at my bloody age and deal with it. 

     

    Thanks again so much for your support today. <3 

  • Calcifications are pretty common, brilliant news! Thanks for the update, have been thinking of you both all afternoon....see.....I said it would be ok....lol xx