Hi there Mathew... I think your in the stage where lots of us who's lost loved ones ... when they first go, I think we're in a sort of brain overdrive , where there's so much to do and process, which can help you get through in the early days ... myself and others I've talked to, say the hardest part is after the funeral when things look like they are getting back to "normal" when it all hits home, that you feel anything but normal , and it makes us feel angry coz how can anything be normal again ... and yet it does, so that's when it's easy to snap at people ... even ones who think they are trying to help ... coz all we want is that person back ... 

I know it's different for everyone ... no one grieves the same ... what helped me was saying , what would my mum say if she could see me hurting so much ... and I knew that would break her heart ... and she would be the first to put an arm around me and say ... come on lass .. 

But that first year I found the most difficult,  always thinking this time last year .. unfortunately we have to go through lots of different emotions ... anger / tears / and every other one ... it's all part of being blessed with someone we love so deeply, so be kind to yourself, know and accept your loving heart is hurting.... and know lots of us have walked this journey, your walking now... so sending you a big caring hug ... chrisie xx 

How true .. sometimes things that help us come from the most unusual things ... but still be kind to your self .... and you never stop missing them ... you are braver then you gave yourself credit for .... xx