Loss of my Dad, I'm heartbroken

Hi, I've just lost my Dad, I'm heartbroken, he was in the hospice for the last 10 days before he passed away, watching him suffer was terrible. The cancer spread rapidly and he fought to the last day. I'm missing him terribly and feel like I how can I carry on without him. My mum is taking it bad too. I'd give everything up I have to have him here.   

  • I'm so sorry to read this. My Dad passed 3 weeks ago. We were very close and saw him most days. His funeral was a week ago today and it's been quite a surreal week since. A real struggle at times and he's constantly on my mind. My 3 children keep me distracted! I try to block out future thoughts and just tell myself I'm not seeing dad today. Not sure if that's really dealing with the fact he's gone forever but I will deal with that process when I'm ready. I have said to family and friends that if I was to get dad back but he'd still be suffering like he was at the end then I'd say no, leave him in peace.  
    Today is a hideaway day for me! 
    Take it a moment at a time. Crying and sadness shows just how much he was loved (and still is) 

     

    kim x
     

  • hi, so sorry to be reading about losing your dad 

    I lost my dad to bowel cancer 7 years ago and my heart was ripped in 2

    over time i thought that if my dad knew i was going around miserable and in tears all the time that it would make him sad so i chose to start doing things and getting out and about and trying to be happy again and it works ( still have bad days ) but a lot of good days now that i know he will be happy if im happy 

    we all cope and grieve very different but that was my way in the end 

    it never leave you love but things will get better in time i promise 

    sending hugs xxx

  • Offline in reply to k1990

    Hi Kim,

    Thank you for your reply, I'm sorry about your dad. It's so hard isn't it, my dad's funeral isn't until a week on Monday, I'm dreading it. I keep thinking I'm just not seeing my dad today too, I can't deal with anything in the future, I keep thinking that he will come back and I can tell him what's been happening. I agree, crying and getting upset means we love them so much take care.

    Becky x 

  • Offline in reply to Caryn1

    Hi Caryn1,

    Thank you for your time to reply to my message, I'm so sorry about your dad too.  Right now I can't think about never seeing my dad again, I suppose one day at a time is the best thing to do and like you my dad wouldn't want me to be unhappy but can't imagine how I can live my life without him  

    Take care xx 

  • Il so sorry for your loss, i too lost my Dad ( 18 th nov) to bowel/ liver cancer- secondry) .. We were told he was dying- although v difficult we saw him lots & got to say what we wanted!! It was hard to watch him decline- we had a week in hospital, 2 in hospice n 9 days @ home - my Mum did an amazing job looking after him!! Funeral is nxt week- i feel il always be sad about it - but Dad couldn't stay as he was - hopefully hes in a better place xxx

  • I am so sorry for the loss you all are experiencing,  I'm in the same boat right now.

    My Mum died  on 24th November. She was formally diagnosed with non hodgkins Lymphoma on 22nd November and due to start chemo on 23rd November, however she never woke up that morning to begin treatment.

    I was called into the hospital and myself, my Dad and my sister stayed with her until she drew her last breath,  24 hours later.

    I'm completely lost and have no idea how I will carry on without her. 

     

     

     

  • Sorry to hear this news, 

    & thank you for your reply, I hope you will find some strength- your journey was all a bit quick??- Gods plan?? - its hard to understand..., Theres no easy way through this !!xxxx 

  • It's hard to see someone you love suffer and harder still for that someone to be someone who was always there for you. Always, regardless. 

    I feel the same about my dad. Not a day goes by that I don't think about him. I am the man I am today because of him.

    All that I can say is that it doesn't get any better, just different. The memories of the good times will far outweigh the recent sad times. 

    That's what helps me through. The times I worked with him, the times he had me in stitches, sometimes through working me hard, mostly through laughter. Never laughed so much as when my father was telling stories.

    I feel your sadness in my heart and wish you well.