Hello, I am 25 years old and my mother was diagnosed with mouth cancer in early 2016. She chose radiotherapy which ended in the summer of 2016. Come November 2016 we were told that my mums condition was terminal and there was nothing else they could do. They did offer chemotherapy but my mum declined as she had reacted badly to the radiotherapy. 

Since being told she was terminal, my mum has been like wonderwoman. She’d been getting on with her life in high spirits and full of hope, very independent, despite no longer being able to eat solid foods (she is peg fed now) and being on a lot of pain relief. 

My mother lives a 2.5 hour car ride from me, but has had great support from my two younger sisters who live near by and friends also. 

I went up to visit her in the new year and she seemed fine. She was complaining about her tummy from being sore as the tube kept popping out. 

Whilst I was visiting, Mum began coughing up a lot of mucus and blood. I was beginning to worry that the cancer had spread down to her lungs. 

A few days ago, I had an ambulance sent out for my mum as she was in absolute agony. She was complaining about her chest hurting, her whole face aching  (that’s because of the cancer) and she couldn’t breathe properly. When the paramedics arrived they said that her temperature was dangerously high and her BP was very low too. So we rushed her to A&E. 

After being checked over and a chest x Ray, it turned out my poor Mum had also come down with pneumonia in her right lung. Not long after that they moved her over to the local hospice. Since being moved there she seems to be improving a little. 

I hate living so far away from her and my sisters, but I will be visiting as often as I possibly can to support everybody and to see my mum. 

I just feel so helpless and deeply saddened because I keep getting this sinking feeling that this is the ‘beginning of the end’ for my Mum. 

I don’t know what to think and I certainly don’t know what to expect.