Hi Liz. It is really tough getting through all of the procedures, operations and chemo. You do get fed up with people saying how well you are looking. I do and mention that I may look ok on the outside but inside......I do hope you continue to improve and eat well certainly with Christmas coming up Take care Simon.

Hi Liz welcome to the forum

i am afraid you are going to have to get used to well wishers ... the mean well

i finished my treatment for throat cancer on August 15th 2014 and still get it .... although I still have to do a bit to maintain trying to be normal again

hows it going with you ... still have you PEG do you

hang in there it gets better slowly from now on

vatch

Thanks Vatch.  What does PEG mean?  Did your cancer effect your eating ability?  The slowness of recovery, especially with the normal everyday things is sooo frustrating!

From the doctors perspective my recovery is going well.  From my perspective I'm still trying to get my head around how much my life and abilities have changed so quickly.  I've started counselling recently and that helps a lot.  I have the space to say all those ungrateful things I shouldn't be saying.

Do you have a lot to do to try to be normal?

Liz

Hi liz

a PEG is a feeding tube that goes straight into you stomach .... for about two months it was the only way I could feed myself as eating and drinking was just not an option.

its a brutal but necessary treatment and dependant on the type of radiotherapy (and where you are in the country) will depend on how much damage has been cause to the salava glands

even two years post treatment I can't eat chocolate as it's too sugary and sandwiches (good I used to love a cheese and pickled onion sandwich) just saps my saliva .... so sweets things I don't miss and I now eat wraps but with liquids mixes inside 

during my treatment the two worst things were loosing my taste totally but more importantly losing my voice for 6 weeks just isolated me from the human race. Although I spoke through my iPad, by the time I had written a reply the conversation had moved on 3 sentences, and although at the start people waiting for me to type, by the end I won that 6 weeks I was a bystander in the corner who moved his eyes up and down in acknowledgement as my neck was too sore to move from the tomotherapy

throughout my treatment and beyond I wrote a blog, it enabled me to speak to everyone, as it told everyone my wife was not saying the same thing a million tims to different people, but really for me it enabled me to get my anger, pain, observation and comedy out .... it kept me sane

even today's I get people from all over the world logging into my blog, messaging me and asking for help and advice....in a way, by giving something back, it's made me come to terms with what I have been through .... and I am bigger than it.

when I finished my treatment my only desire was to be normal again and was determined not to let cancer define who I am.

Im about 80% of the person I was pre cancer ... fitness wise, I can taste most things but some are just bland, I sleep like a baby ... which I have come to love .... and I push myself too hard to the extend my body says enough and I know I have to sleep.

but I am alive and living life for every minute, colour, smell, touch and memory ... because I can.

my biggest piece of advice is talk, get it out

i have met some fantastic people on here, all who had head and neck cancers and even though we are out the other side we still chat about everything and nothing and we all meet up now and then and we are from all over the uk and of differing ages ... but we are all linked 

so I have waffled on far too long

lets talk about you

vatch

Hey Liz,

ok, i don't feel sorry for you and you're not doing well at all... :p  no seriously people mean well but understand you can get fed up of it especially since you know it's not true inside... having said that i am very glad you are beginning to heal thtough the counselling, you have been through a lot emotionally and phsically... your body and mind is in shock and it will take a while to recover... but i wish you nothing but the best for a full recovery physically and spiritually...

god bless x