Hi Bluette. 

Alot of people come on forum and write ideas down to figure out best options or just to have a good rant and let off steam. 

We all have the option of a long life but not a good one,  or a short but pleasant one. 

I myself was on meds that made me wonder what day it was and what i was doing but at least it shrunk my cancer. Oncologist cut my dose down and i felt better for a while, so cut dose again to1/4 strength felt good again for couple of weeks, so stopped meds entirely felt good for months but cancer started pains so radiotherapy and soon chemotherapy. Sometimes think is it worth it. 

I made a promise to my wife to be before she'd marry me (she's nearly 14 years older than me)that I'd look after her when she got old (51 years together this dec 1st. ),she's got alzimers and parkinsons and other things. I'm her carer im sticking to my promise. 

Oh I've prostate cancer gone to lymph node's pelvis spine ribs and a lung. Palative care since 2016. 

Hope others will join you soon people who understand what cancer is like. And treatment options. 

Billy 

Hi Billy

Thanks for replying.  I was very moved by your story.  That's a lovely photo of you and your wife, and I was impressed by your vow to your wife and your determination to stick to it, regardless of your health challenges.

I can imagine that you did have a wonderful few months without treatment. My mum always used to say to me when I was young 'at least you've got your health' whenever I was whingeing about something. How true that is. I didn't appreciate it at the time! But as you say the cancer does tend to come back and often it spreads.  Your post has reminded me that the bones are a site which lung cancer often spreads to; as is the brain.  Maybe I should try to accept the inconvenience of going into hospital once in a while, by carrying on with the current treatment regime, if it minimises the risk of the cancer spreading. This is something I can discuss with the oncologist tomorrow.  

Thanks again for your post. It has helped me clarify my own thoughts. Plus, the caring relationship you have with your wife, despite your own problems, is very uplifting. 

Thanks, Bluette

Hi just a thought, if you go to beginning of your message at the blue bar open search and enter what information you want you should have details of others with same problem.  Also if you touch name or picture it should open details of that person, warning some don't put details on. 

Hope things go ok tomorrow and you remember all your questions (hopefully you wrote things down. ).

Billy 

Thanks very much Billy. 

Hope things went ok yesterday. You remembered everything you wanted to say and got your answers. 

Billy 

Hi BiIly

I managed to see the oncologist and a specialist lung nurse yesterday.  They disagreed amongst themselves - sometimes I think the nurses know more than the doctors, but I am happy with what the doctor proposed. The nurse wanted to keep the dosage as it is, with the addition of a white blood cell stimulator every cycle, to try and protect my neutrophils..  The doctor preferred to reduce the dose of one of my drugs, Pemetrexed, by 25%.  I am happy with that, though would have liked to try the nurse's suggestion.  Anyway, I'm splitting hairs. They were kind and respectful and came up with a plan I am ok with.  They also answered questions about treatment and supportive care further down the line. 

I asked if it was inevitable that my cancer would spread. I guess I have been lured into a false sense of security because the scans have showed a stable tumour since treatment began. However, it only means stable for now.  The doctor looked a bit sheepish, but he said yes, it would spread. I knew that really.  So, the plan is to have chemo tomorrow at the reduced dose. 

Thanks very much for your enquiry, I really appreciate it.

Regards, Bluette

Evening Bluette, glad you got things sorted with oncologist and dr. 

Im under 2 specialists and quite a few times one doesn't talk to other to figure out best options and then i get problems with treatment. 

Im surprised others haven't been on this string yet. Though things can be quiet sometimes  .hope others join soon. 

Ps my cancer is coming back for third time, first time was over 4 years after diagnosis 2nd time 18 months later,this time about a year, different treatment each time, getting short of options. 

Im still positive and sure, and determined to keep looking after my wife.despite her being a very bossy female. 

Billy 

Hi Billy

Your comment about looking after your bossy female made me laugh. These things can keep us going in a funny sort of way. I just live with my friend and two cats. The cats run rings round us and I want to keep going for as long as I can, so that I can minister to their every whim! Fortunately my friend will be able to look after them when my time comes. It was also amusing to see the female nurse keep interrupting the doctor on Wednesday. He was a registrar and put up with it. I guess when he's a consultant she won't dare to question him. I did think she was right though. At least these two were in the same room and on the same team. It must be difficult for you having two different specialists. They can be blinkered, don't communicate and the patient suffers. 

So far my cancer has only come back once, within 6 months of what the surgeon thought would be curative surgery. But I have been told it will spread, whatever treatment I have. At least I'm not coughing with this treatment. 

Hope you have as good a day as possible. At least the sun is shining, here in London anyway.

Regards, Bluette

Glad your cough has gone off. 

Not sure about London, we live in North Lincolnshire plenty of open spaces and good air, although plenty of wind and rain, and hot sunshine now and again 

We've a spoilt chihuahua, she eats drinks and sleeps 12 years old very bossy when she wants something so I've two females around me day and Night both snore. 

Hope things keep going well. 

Billy 

Hi Billy

The chemo went ok yesterday.  The cannula went in first time - often difficult as my veins are tiny.  I love the North sea coast. I managed to have some lovely days out this summer in North Essex and Suffolk. Lincolnshire was a bit too far. As I get so breathless these days, I couldn't swim in the sea, but enjoyed floating and sunbathing.  Those memories have helped me during these dark November days.  

I hope your chemo is ok when you start it. Well, we both know it sometimes needs tinkering with, but I hope that on balance it helps.  

Someone else's snoring can be really disturbing during a sleepless night.  However, I have surprised myself by waking up to hear my own gentle snoring at times, and hearing one of the cats at it too. Such is life!

Thanks for your supportive messages over the last few days.

Many regards, Bluette