Hi there ...

Bless ya ... it sure is a rollercoaster ride ... and your right ... this is a great place to vent ... it's just as hard on loved ones ... esp when the communications are fraught ... your dad sounds like he's finding it hard to cope too ... but hopefully it just may help a little you getting it all off your chest ...

Hang on in there ... and there's always someone here, who knows just how hard things can get ... 

Sending you a vertual hug... Chrissie x

Hi my dad is dying now from lung cancer spread to his brain and his aggression is bad too, he can’t bear noise at all and everybody gets shouted at even my daughter, I no that he does not mean it, he is going through hell, he doesn’t want to go yet but can’t stop it, I have been strong but think it’s just hitting me now just keep biting my lip as not to cry the last couple of days x

Dear Ali_89. I have only posted on here twice as I don't really know what to say to anybody really  But I read your post and I recognised the confusion and fear in your words   I have had mental health problems since I was a child and struggle with a lot of things    I'm trying to come to terms with my husband being taken ill only 18 weeks ago and now receiving only palliative chemo to try to prolong the inevitable   Like you I just can't get my head round it all. I cannot cope with what is happening and don't know how I am going to get through I'm really not managing at all mentally but I try because I have to look after him and my children  I'm so sorry for what you're going through and I send you all my love and thoughts .   After coming on here and reading all the posts from all these lovely kind but terrified people I realise that I am not alone.  I understand that when you have mental health problems that things are different so if you ever want to talk about anything at all I'm planning on k using this site as a way of hopefully coping somehow.   Please take care of yourself. And cherish your mum and dad xxxxxxx

Hi Ali,

I've experienced a similar situation, I realissed I could only influence my own behaviour and not be reponsible for for anybody anybody else, care for your mother, love her,mthat's all you ca do and she will appreciate it, others ahve to be resonsible for their own behavior and that is not your burden, if you feel I can help in any way please don't hesitste to respond

Thank you so much for replying. I really do appreciate your words. Same goes for you,and ANY one, if there's anything I can help with, even if it's  being an ear, I want to. I hate that so many of us fight this, but what I do love...about  it , is .... this place.We can come together,and support each other! Again, thank you for your kind words.

Ali.x

Thank you greatly for those words. I understand it's not easy for us, to ... disclose our mental health,as there is still this horrid stigma about it. I wish more people existed like those on these forums. You're all so kind to each other on here, and I love that about this place. Not only will I plan on using this hopefully as way to cope, but to help as well. Please , never feel alone. I know it may not be an instant comfort, but at least on here, we can legit say, "I understand",and it's not a patronising way. Thank you again for those words. They mean a lot. If there's anything I can help with, please. Get in touch. I'm gonna try to come on here a couple of times a day, to update/read. 

Ali. x 

I'm so  sorry to read that. :( I'm not sure what part of the world you're in, but have a look into what support you can have for ....terminal/palative? :( please, also look after yourself. And, don't be afraid to cry. I know timing is important, we don't want our loved ones to see us upset , but don't afraid to take time out and let it out! 

Ali. x 

Thank you for replying to this. Yes. Rollercoaster! .... but then...rollercoasters are meant to be fun. This is ....I feel like this is purgatory. I sometimes wonder if this is MY karma for things I've done in the past. I'm not sure. Watching ... waiting....we're gettin a CT scan done tomorrow on mum. Chest/Abdomen/Pelvis. To see if the cancer is still in the general lymph node area, or if it's ...spread.... as it's been about 4 months now since mum's masectomy.... 

This is a fantastic place to come, to comfort. to be comforted by people who really are going through same sort of journey. If I at all can help, please. Let me know! I don't want to come here just for help. I want to help as well! 

Ali. x 

Hi

im new to this ... I dnt know wat ur going through but I can relate to that pain ur feeling wen someone u love is going through health issues an u feel like u can’t do anything for them... my younger brother has a brain tumour an NHS have now decided there isn’t anything they can do apart from off palliative care... it’s so painful to hear ... I feel like I’m on the lip of insanity... but how can I be... I’m not the one this is happening to ... 

mom sorry I’m probably making this worse for u...