Welcome to this friendly forum Hannah!

Your mum certainly sounds like a lovely person and as you said so selfless. It was so nice of her to keep her diagnosis secret in order not to ruin your wedding day. Did you have a good day by the way? We like wedding stories too here :)

It is normal that you feel like this at the moment as she has only just been diagnosed and there is probably still a lot of uncertainty. I hope she finds out soon about the cyst in her ovary. The CT scan is tomorrow then?

Please come back here and let us know how the scan goes - we will be keeping everything crossed for you. 

I will now let you have a chat with others on our forum! Many on here know only too well how long the wait feels when going through medical exams.

Best wishes,

Lucie, Cancer Chat Moderator

Hi Hanna,

I am so sorry to read your post. Medically speaking there is nothing much you can do to help your dear mother, but where you can make a differnce is with the emotional support. To be told you have cancer is a very frightening thing especially at first when you are lacking information regarding treatments ect.

The feeling you have is understandable and I felt just the same when my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. You do feel helpless, in fact you feel a whole range of emotions that can often muddle your normal thinking process.

As you live so far away, if your mother has a computer, could you talk to her via skype? Just a thought.

Please take care oif yourself for the relatives like yourself suffer too, Brian.

Hannah,

Take a deep breath and try not to rush into things. "Take one day at a time" has become a bit of a platitude but it is still good advice. 

Your Mum is a nurse and will know the score far more than you do. Her decision not to tell you until after the wedding was a good one, it will have had no impact on the care she is receiving and avoided overshadowing your special day.

Don't worry about the lack of an MRI scan ( I've never had one) as the CAT scan will give the level of detail required for a reliable diagnosis. 

I hope today's CAT scan goes OK.

Best wishes
Dave
x

Hi Lucie,

You are quite right - this is a lovely, friendly forum full of wonderful people with comforting words. I am very lucky to have found it. The wedding was lovely thank you - the sun shone on us and Mum (also a Lucy) looked absolutely radiant :-)

Mum's CAT scan was today but done by a technician, so results will be sent to the hospital (hopefully soon). Fingers crossed for good news and then her operation next Friday can go ahead as scheduled. I think we will all feel more in control once we have a plan of action - no spread = radiotherapy, spread = chemo and radio, etc.

I will keep you updated. Thank you for the kind and calming words.

Hannah x

Good Evening Brian,

Firstly, a big thank you for taking the time to write to me. You are quite right - it is the not knowing that makes everything so much more frightening/frustrating/upsetting. I find my mind drifting from what I should be doing to thinking about Mum; I have never been a day dreamers before and my head feels so cloudy!

We have been using Facetime (iphone version of skype) this week which has been lovely. I think we will schedule a regular catch up so I don't miss her face for too long.

Thank you again for your kind thoughts, very much appreciated. Genuinely.

Hannah x

Hi Dave,

Your words have had a very calming effect on me. Sometimes being told stop for a second can really help. Thank you for taking the time to reply to me. This forum is showing just how much the kindness of strangers can be overlooked.

It was a very brave, but sensible decision and I can definitely see her reasons. Obviously she had the support from Dad and her sister to keep her going until my brother and I found out, and it is lovely to see the photos now 2 weeks on and seeing her look so radiant and almost carefree. 

The CAT scan was today, just waiting for results now. Hopefully time will be kind and let us know what is happening asap. 

Thank you again for your kind, calm words.

Hannah x