My amazing mum was diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer back in March this year... she was doing really well and recently started immunotherapy treatment.
Unfortunately, mum stopped eating and drinking and was really sleepy for a few weeks. She previously had a mini stroke and I thought maybe she was experiencing more of them, which ultimately lead me and my sister to phoning an ambulance. She was admitted into hospital and suddenly, without any scans we were told the cancer had become more aggressive and they were going to stop all treatment and put her on palliative care with just weeks to live.
I feel so guilty, I wish I never made her go to hospital, perhaps if she never went she would still be able to access treatment ?! Did the hospital stay ultimately make her worse? I can’t help but blame myself for her rapid decline I have so much guilt and regret and I don’t know how I will ever get my head round all of this!!
I wish i could let my mum go, but I just can’t. I am pregnant and I planned this baby once i found out about my mums diagnosis. It is my only wish she would just be able to meet my little one, but i fear that she won’t make it til June and i know in my heart it’s not fair to make her keep hanging on for me
i don’t really know what i want from this post, but any advice would be welcomed ❤️