I haven't lived close to my Mum and brother for over 10 years, but have always managed to go home for Christmas. I lost my Mum in March and now I'm getting quite anxious about having to spend my first Christmas on my own, as travelling has become more difficult with COVID.
My friends are all travelling to their families, so I don't really have much of an option to celebrate with someone here. I also kind of don't want to celebrate with anyone else, as it just wouldn't be the same.
Perhaps some of you could share their stories? I only came out of a really bad mental state recently (although I'm not quite sure, if I'm in total denial) and I'm worried things will get worse again. So I'm hoping some of you might be able to help.
I put a Christmas tree up (as advised by a mate of mine) as he knows that I really love Christmas and my Mum would be upset if she knew I was ignoring the whole thing altogether...