I have followed many of your posts and replies over the past year and, have no doubt whatsoever that your input will have helped a great many. This latest news is I’m sure some of the worst you feel you could possibly get. As a mum myself, I know just how harrowing it can be to have a child diagnosed with cancer of any kind.
I will answer your question first of all. It is not at all unusual to have a CT scan before surgery. This will help your daughter’s surgeon to clarify exactly what s/he is dealing with and where it is, so should help to ensure that it is all taken away and, reduce the risk of recurrence. I had a CT scan on both occasions prior to surgery. I also had an MRI. Instead of being frightened by these additional tests, please look at them with reassurance that your daughter’s surgeon is being ultra-cautious and checking out everything that s/he can.
Now, I’m going to try and look at your situation impartially for a moment and see if we can put a better slant on things for you all. I include your husband in this, as there is always that special bond between dads and their daughters.
It sounds to me as if you have gone straight back into the panic mode that so many of us become familiar with in the early days of diagnosis and, who can blame you from looking at the worst case scenario? What you have overlooked is that you have come through it all and, there is a strong chance that your daughter will most likely do the same.
My mother had breast cancer 21 years ago. She had it for 12 years before she developed secondaries in her liver, lungs, bones and brain. I will never forget how hard that was for me as her only daughter. The one consolation I have is that she didn’t survive for long enough to see me diagnosed with it too. I do however live in constant fear that my daughter might be next in line, but there is nothing that I can do to ensure that this doesn’t happen. I sincerely hope that your mammogram on Saturday gives you the reassurance you need and, that it will help you to look at your daughter’s plight in a more reasoned way.
I always feel so sorry for young mums when they have a diagnosis, as the additional worries about family welfare are bound to come high up in any list of priorities. What ages are your grandchildren? It is particularly difficult for you when she lives a distance away from you. My family does too and, this can certainly magnify any concerns you have. I hope that when you see her next week this may allay some of your fears and, you can support one another to fight this together.
I hope that all goes well for her on 15th and, I feel sure that you will find this easier to cope with once you know more about her diagnosis and, know exactly what she is dealing with. Are you going to be able to stay with her while she has her surgery? One good thing about your own experience should be that you can keep her informed of what is happening or is about to happen, so there shouldn’t be quite so many of those scary unknowns.
You mention that she got herself checked out after you were diagnosed, so hopefully she’s caught it in the early stages, which should make any treatment she has that much more effective.
I am ever hopeful that by this time next year you will both be cancer free and able to live life in a more positive frame of mind once more.
Do please keep us in the loop. As you know, we are all here for you and, are ready to support you all through this nightmare.