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Feeling lonely on my journey.

17 Nov 2017 10:00

ive not long finished chemo and will be having a mastectomy and reconstruction at the beginning of December. It's been a long 6 months since my diagnosis of triple negative breast cancer. I also split with my partner in January and we are still going through court with regards to our 5 year old son. All I need. My mum has been my rock throughout this. However I still feel lonely. My friends were all there at the start. However weeks can go by without even a text message from any of them. I just want to be normal. I cry every day. Usually through self pity. I no I should be grateful that I'm still here. Is there anyone I can talk to. X

wendy77

Feeling lonely on my journey.

17 Nov 2017 10:28 in response to Wendy77

Hi Wendy. You can talk to any one on here, there are a lot of use who have/had breast cancer in one form or another.  Don’t think you’re alone with this, you’re not. 

Feeling lonely on my journey.

17 Nov 2017 12:30 in response to Wendy77

Welcome to Cancer Chat, Wendy77. 

I wanted to stop by to say hello, and to let you know that you're not alone on here.

I know that we have other members on the forum with a similar diagnosis to you - I'm tagging @JaneH @Kerry11 ‍ @Deb53 ‍and [@Helen49]‍who I hope won't mind me mentioning them. They may well reply but, in the meantime, please do keep posting if you feel able to.

As rileyroo says, you can talk to anyone on here - we're here to listen. 

Take care,

Helen
Cancer Chat moderator

Feeling lonely on my journey.

17 Nov 2017 14:11 in response to Moderator Helen

Hi Wendy 77.

 Just want to say hi. I’m going through chemo now for triple negative breast cancer. I can related about feeling lonely. Everyone was there for me at first now hardly hear or see anyone. 

Here if you want a chat anytime . 

Shirl3.xx

Feeling lonely on my journey.

18 Nov 2017 09:42 in response to Shirl3

Wendy hang in there. My easiest way of handling the loneliness was not to expect anything from anyone. I hzve always been the type to drop everything and be there for anyone who needs me. That has changed.

This forum is the best thing and has gotten me through some pretty terrible times. Cancer is a bas**** and you are strong enough so don't forget that. Get through your treatment  - then deal with the others. Sometimes people dont know how or what to say and just write you off coz it's easier for them. We're all here in the same boat helping you to paddle through.

Each day is precious so why waste it on those who aren't there for You. What I would 've done to have my mom with me - she passed away 19 years ago. A mother's love is so precious and just makes you feel better having them there.

I haven't had chemo so can't imagine what you're going through but had lumpectomy and radiation- now on tamoxifen. Always remember  - you're not alone.

Feeling lonely on my journey.

18 Nov 2017 21:13 in response to Shirl3
Hello shirl3 Hope your treatment is going well. I can't wait for my hair to start growing back. Especially by eyebrows and lashes. I was overwhelmed with support at first. But now I need it most it's gone. Makes me feel like I've done something wrong. Like it's all my fault for having cancer. It makes me want to shut myself away from the world till it's over. Hope you have support whist on your journey. It's tough on your own. Wendy77 x

Feeling lonely on my journey.

19 Nov 2017 05:19 in response to Wendy77

Hi Wendy. 

Feeling tired as accepted. Got round 3 next week. Hope I don’t end up in hospital again...Ive still got my eyebrows, theve thinned.

Ive got 2 really good friends who have been brilliant. One is an old school friend and books days off work to come to chemo with me. The other is a god send and has my daughter when I’ve ended up in hospital. I just want to hide away till it’s all over..

Shirl3x

Feeling lonely on my journey.

19 Nov 2017 07:19 in response to Wendy77
I have had similar experience - only constant has been hubby and daughter. My own sister who has recovered from stage 1 breast cancer also abandoned me. In laws were ok - brought food over twice in last 10 months. It is lonely but you got this - we're all here.xxxx

Feeling lonely on my journey.

20 Nov 2017 06:49 in response to Wendy77

Hi Wendy 77 so sorry you feel so down you can talk to me whenever you like you can read my situation my  name is little kitt I'm am terminal but not coping well so get in touch let's see if I can lift your spirits xx

Feeling lonely on my journey.

20 Nov 2017 07:58 in response to Littlekittt

Try a little treat just for yourself? It doesn’t have to be expensive. My cousin who also has triple negative bc gets her nails done. She says it covers up how bad her nails have looked during chemo and it’s something that’s done for her and makes her feel good. 

Feeling lonely on my journey.

20 Nov 2017 10:22 in response to Wendy77

Hello there Wendy77,

I am so sorry that you are going through this dark tunnel on your own. I went through it when I was diagnosed with Lymphoma a year and a half ago. I know that place well, but with time, support and a LOT ofprayers I came out,

I know all those feelings but you will get better and have your body back and your life back. But you know having the cancer is also your life, not just a non event that is an inconvenience, Embrace it, it will teach you such a lot. You will learn where the love is. Sounds like your Mum, and I should think your child, and maybe your ex partner. Keep the love in your life if you can. Shame on your friends who are not there for you.

I will be here for you.....talk to me any time. Bless you......believe me, it will get better. Just be patient. If you need to, get in touch with the oncology ward and ask to see a counsellor. or join a group.....Macmillan are wonderful.....contact them. 

I know you wont feel like doing these things at the moment.....and maybe you need to cry. You are going through a bereavement.....a loss of yourself as you were. You WILL be you again and WILL recover and find a love again. Cling to your mother and child. They will never leave you. Neither will I Love to and with you.

Feeling lonely on my journey.

20 Nov 2017 10:27 in response to Littlekittt

Hello littlekit with the big heart......bless you.

seriously ill but still got love enough to lift Wendys spirits.

what aninspiration you are,

Weensie xxxxxx

Feeling lonely on my journey.

20 Nov 2017 16:48 in response to rileyroo

Hi rileyroo. 

I get my nails done for the same reason. Think it's just that I have all these other things going on aswell. Court over my son. Then my nan goes and gets her angel wings last night aswell. I'm just overwhelmed. 

 

Feeling lonely on my journey.

20 Nov 2017 16:52 in response to weensie

Hi weenie. 

 

thank you you for your reply. I am trying to get to a support group. Just want to get these court issues out of the way. Following this we have my mans funeral as she sadly passed away last night. She was 96 and ready to go. Feel like it's all pilling up on top of me and I'm going go drown. X

Feeling lonely on my journey.

20 Nov 2017 16:53 in response to Littlekittt

You can always talk to me aswell little kitt. Maybe I can do the same for you. X