Hi Gemini,
I am sorry to read that you are suffering so much at the moment. I don't have experience of caring for someone with cancer so don't have any real words of wisdom but I have read many of your posts offering so much support to people of this forum and just wanted to say that I am thinking of you. Is it possible that you could arrange to meet some friends near you but explain in advance that you need to have some 'time out' and don't want to talk about it? I know what you mean about shopping etc, it is difficult to see the normality of life going on around you when the bottom has dropped out of yours.

xxxx

Thank you so much when I read the post on here i forget about what I'm going though it's nice to feel bit normal if that makes any sense that why I try and answer if is to say hi . I feel like I need to be doing something if I didn't have join on here I would be feeling ten times worse this do help I just want to try and help others if I can if its just chat.thanks again for you kind words.take care x 

I know exactly what you mean about using this forum, it can be helpful to engage with others and take your mind off things for a bit. I hope that this down bit of the terrible rollercoaster doesn't last too long for you and you can feel a bit better soon xx

Thank you so much for you kinds words it's so hard my mother have also bought all the Christmas presents she even wrote letter to my 9 month old baby boy for him when he older he the youngest grandson. It's just little things hurt  we all live near so we all back and for.when time comes my mother don't want to go in hospice she want to be at home and my father have said she don't want her to go into hospital as well. I think what hurts you never think it's going to happen to you it just happened so quick finding out and seeing her in bit pain like she told me she not frighten of dying it's not knowing .she even apologize to me because she upset me when we had chat I rather here talk to us. Don't mind me asking did you know how long your mother had left . Thanks again for you kind words take care x 

Hi,

We found out Mum was terminal on the 1st August and she was given 4-6 months. She had some chemo to try and buy more time but that almost killed her and she went down hill very rapidly after that. She didn't even get her 4 months :( My Dad buried his head in the sand and was talking about stopping work when she felt a bit better so they could do things but she never did feel a bit better and he stopped work the day she went into the hospice. She was adamant she was not dying at home and given the amount of care she needed during the last 2 weeks there was no way we would have managed at home - my parents house has loads of stairs so logistically it would have been a nightmare.

My Mum also used to apologise for putting us all through it and making us upset, still thinking of her family before herself even when dying.

It is so lovely that your Mum has written your son a letter. My sister's youngest was born the day before my Mum's birthday a month before she died so she got cuddles with her youngest grandson before she went. She didn't write letters but did plan her funeral, including type of coffin, music, where the after party would be held, what we should wear (Christmas jumpers!! you have never seen a stranger looking funeral party, even the minister wore his Christmas tie) etc.  These are the nice memories that last as the horrible ones dull, which they start to eventually.

Hugs x

Feeling for you. Xxx

Thank you so much it's so hard not only for me going though this is everyone as well it's cruel.

Hi Gemini39

I also feel so down, my sister who is 35 has been given the news her cancer is now terminal and she has 3 weeks to live. Im really struggling to come to terms with this and seeing her is heart breaking but she needs me now more than ever. How do you ever get over someone you love fading away? I cant imagine living without her. I also hear people talking about christmas and holidays i feel angry and bitter why her why us. I went to see my GP who offered me sleeping pills but i am not sure i have never used them before and the pain only returns when i wake up x