Father in law wont go to hospital

This is going to be a tough one to write. 

My father in law will not go to get diagnosed. He went to the doctors because had blood in poo and kept being sick, they thought it could be cancer so he had an appointment at the hospital rushed through. He went to that and then didnt go back for the camera. We suspected he had stomach cancer.

A few weeks later his health is getting worse by the week. He started hiding that he was being sick which was black! He had been laid in bed not well for  a week or so. He hardly eats anymore, he is aggrivated with his wife, he has a bloated stomach. 

My mother is law rang my husband today saying that he is getting worse and has started randomly falling asleep, he has dropped 3 cigarettes (we know he shouldnt smoke but he is set in his ways)  and a cup of tea today due to falling asleep. 

From researching online it seems he may have stomach cancer which may have spread to his liver :( 

We wont know for sure cos he will not go to the doctors he said he would rather not know.

It sounds to me with the way he is at the minute that he doesnt have long left now :( 

 

  • The poor man , he must be terribly distressed and frightened . So sorry he is going through this . He need love , support and great respect for his dignity at this time . Although you all have no way of knowing exactly what is going on it sounds difficult and distressing . Could you get a kindly gp to come visit him and have a chat and privately discuss his options/ fears ? Again the dignity of the person to make their own decisions for as long as they can has to be respected . Try to encourage his entourage to be kind , present for him and respectful . If time is indeed limited it’s important these last weeks : months can be spent as calmly as possible . Wishing you all courage and strength. 

  • Thankyou for your reply

    We have tried and tried to talk to him about going in and getting help with what ever is wrong but he wont, when my mother in law tries he shouts at her and swears and says i am not going.

    I think he just doesnt want to know. Its hard for us not knowing but we are respecting his decision :( 

    I will just keep being there for them as much as i can. Bless him. It has to be hard for him and he will be feeling alot worse than what we are.