Hi there - this must be an awful place to be for you & for your husband. My only advice would be to see your GP & ask for counselling as it's clearly not something you are able to sort out for yourself. Your GP can't be worried about cancer otherwise s/he would send you for tests immediately & as that hasn't happened I hope you can be at least a little bit reassured on that front.

As I say tho', the most important thing for you is to get some help about how this is affecting your life so much. If you don't feel able to do it for yourself then perhaps you might want to do it for your husbands sake? If you are honest with your GP about what is happening to you I feel sure you will get the help you need.

Do please take care of this & best wishes to you. x

Thankyou so much for your kind words. I do think counselling is wot I need. I feel so down and considering the things people are going thru on here I feel a bit of a fraud but its something I cannot help. I will be making an appointment on Monday for the doctors and take it from there. I do wish everyone on here the very best of luck 

Take care and thankyou for your thoughts x

You're more than welcome sweetie & I know it's something you can't help otherwise you would. I'm really pleased you're going to make an appt., with your GP - that's JUST the right thing to do. Give it a little bit of time & this unhappy phase will pass as everything in life does. (I know I've seen a lot of it - lived quite a long time) ;)

Look after yourself x

Maz1, I have recently discovered  a lump in my armpit, havn't been to the doctors yet, I have terrible health anxiety and the thought of going to the doctor or hospital fills me with dread.   My grandmother died from breast cancer that started in the armpit. The lump is getting bigger, but our dream holiday booked about a year ago starts next Tuesday.  I will try to get an emergency appointment for referal on Monday.  Meantime I can't eat, sleep I am so eaten up with anxiety, like you I am just living.  It's not fair on my husband too, especially at a time when we should be about to have a lovely time.

Hi there Christmas2018. Thankyou so much for your post. I know exactly how you are feeling because my first and biggest cyst I found in my breast was my birthday. My husband was taking me away on the weekend and my appointment was on the Monday so i went away had a good time helped with a couple of glasses of wine but it was always in my mind. It needs to be sorted for you before you go away to ease your mind and help you enjoy your lovely holiday. Maybe like me you will need some counselling help or whatever it takes to keep your mind healthy and help you and your husband thru this. Please keep us informed on how things go. I will be thinking of you.

Take care x

Hi Maz thank you for your kind reply, it is a comfort to know that I am not the only one who worries like this.  Well I woke up this morning and the worry started straight away, I am actually feeling sick with it.  We drive up to Heathrow tomorrow but I am going to phone the surgery first thing to try and get an emergency appointment.  It won’t stop the worry but at least it would start the process of getting a referral to the hospital for tests rather than have to wait until I get back.  My husband is getting fed up with me because I had a thyroid scare which started just before Christmas last year until I got the all clear in April.  I went to pieces then but this is even worse.  He said last night as I struggled to eat my dinner “ Your not starting that nonsense again”. I don’t blame him, seeing me moping around must be depressing and  it’s not fair to spoil his looked forward to holiday.  My user name has changed had trouble logging on with the old one.  I will let you know how I get on tomorrow xx

Hi Christmas i hope you don't mind me saying but I'd have thought your husband would be a bit more thoughtful when I'm ill (cemo) my wife helps all she can and she's disabled we always help each other it keeps us close we wouldn't think of not helping or just being thortless with words, he should be helping you.

Billy 

Bless your heart. This is a time wen the support is one of the most important things and you are definitely not starting nonsense. I dont know what I would have done without my husbands support. He even comes in the room with me wen I gave different appointments. He is my absolute rock. I really hope it goes ok. I really do feel for you. I am here anytime ok. Let me know how you get on and then go off and have a fabulous holiday. I will be waiting to hear all about it wen you get back  x

Hi Billygoat, he is very considerate in many ways but my health anxiety is as bad as it gets and he does not understand why I go to pieces.  I have had serious depression in the past and he had a lot to put up with then.  There can be nothing worse than living with a person moping around like me.  I don’t think that he realises how a lump under the arm could be a sign of cancer and he thinks that I am making too much of it.  Normally I am a cheerful person, but worry is my worst enemy.  Hope that your chemo is going well for you.

Christmas

Thank you Max, it’s so good to have a friend who knows how I feel.  Will be in touch.x