Hello sunshine 1987; welcome.  I am sorry that your dad is not going to be able to get any treatment to halt the spread of his cancer now.  There has been a lot of discussion about anticipatory grief on this website in the 15 months I have been posting here.  You might like to look up others who have discussed this.  You can do this by clicking the words Search Forum on the blue banner above your post.  In the box which opens up type in the words Anticipatory Grief: you will find many posts containing these words.  You may like to contact some of the more recent posters to discuss your situation.  Having lost too many family and friends to cancer over time I know what it means also; how it grabs hold of you and won't let go.   I hope your father is given time to see his grandchild but you may like to talk to him (if his health starts to deteriorate quickly) about making a memory book for his grandchild - containing things like photos and letters and indeed anything that will maintain your father's memory.  I know you don't want to think about this possibility but it is just an idea if the worst happens.  Annie

Hi Sunshine,

I'm sorry to hear about your dad. It truly is devastating news. I'm currently experiencing anticipatory grief and it's extremely hard to cope with. It's all of these emotions balled up inside and it's like an attack on your brain and your body. The endless tears and anxious feelings are almost unbearable. I hope your Dad gets to meet his grandchild. You are in my thoughts.

Northern

Hi Sunshine.

So sorry to hear about what you and your dad are going through.

I'm in a sort of similar situation as my mum has just been given a stage 3/4 throat cancer diagnosis and I am 20 weeks pregnant. 

It's very hard to concentrate on the baby (and what needs to be done in advance of the baby coming) and I am very anxious, not sleeping well and crying a lot.

So although I can't offer any practical advice I can only say you're not alone and I understand the feelings you must be having.

Take care xx