Hi Mouse sorry to hear of your diagnosis, its pretty scary and can understand where ou coming from.  I am 10 weeks post surgery, cancer found in large bowel.  I am on adjuvant chemo oxaliplatin and capecitabine, I have intravenous first day then tablets for remaning two weeks then I get a week off all meds before starting the cycle again.  Wednesday morning I take my last meds for this cycle.  I will be doing 8 of these.  I don't know what treatment they have you on so I am only telling you my experience..... the main thing seems to be my feet, they can't stand the cold, I am constantly in thermal socks and winter slippers.  Hands felt it too but seem to have eased off.  My throat was affected when drinking/eating anything cold... like swallowing shards of glass or ice, that has gone now after 8 days.  I had two days of upset tummy before I got that under control.  Joints ached a lot but again managed that with ibrofin.  No sick feelings at all and eating has been fine, used plastic utensil in case I got metalic taste from normal cutlery.  No mouth sores.  Couple headaches.  Nothing so far thats not been managable.  Like I say this has been my experience so far, I have no idea what the 2nd round will do as it will be a build up of the drug.  Oh and fatigue for sure.

good luck with your treatment and please let us know how you get on, love and light x

Hi  I  was  diagnosed with rectal cancer last december 23rd,  had  to  have  chemo  first  as  tumour  could  not  be  removed  unless  they  were  able  to  shrink  it. I  had  the  same  chemo  as  yourself , first  cycle  was  not  too  bad  but  2nd  and  3rd  was  just  a  build  up  from  the  first  so  side  effects  were  slightly  worse  each  time. Please  tfy  not  to  get  too  worked  up  about  all  of  this  as  each  person  is  different  anc  you  might  get  through  it  with  minimal  effects. I  have  had  my  surgery  since  then  and  all  the  cancer  has  been  removed, my  oncologist  has  told  me  that  they  will  keep  an  eye  on  me  and  I  will  get  6 monthly  scans  but  there  is  no  way  they  can  tell  if  the  cancer  will  return,  I  feel  really  lucky  to  still  be  here  and  I  do  think  about  it  returning  but  I  wont  let  it  rule  my  life. If  thd  cancer  were  to  return  I  would  not  hesitate  in  going  through  the  chemo  again  as  long  as  I  could  spend  time  with  my  family. I  dont  think  your  oncologist  would  give  you  this  chemo  if  he  thought  it  would  affect  your  chest,  if  you  have  a  colorectal  nurse  give  her  a  call  I  am  sure  she  will  be  able  to  set  your  mind  at  ease. I  hope  all  goes  well  and  once  you  get  started  on  your  treatment  the  time  will  soon  pass  take  care  and  please  let  us  know  how  you  get  on

                                                                    Best  Wishes  Susan

morning, so pleased to hear form someone, thankyou it really helps. the treatment youre on is what has been planned for me. thankyou for sharing youre experiences and tips. im hoping after first dose i might feel better about what to expect and how what and how im going to feel like. after several bowel preps im trying to remain positive that any probems in that area cant possibly be any worse! yuk the taste of that stuff!! 

i had a very bad reaction to one lot and ended up being admitted through a @ e and my experience there has caused me to totally dread ever being in that position again.

huge loss of confidence at moment which i need to try and claw back. 

will let you know how it goes and wishing you too the very best with your remaing treatments x

thankyou so much for repling and sharing your experiences. hoping all is going well for you now and continues to. it helps to chat to others. you are right everyone reacts differently and i have no way of knowing yet how it will make me feel and like you say the effects could be minimal. 

was coping really well but it hadnt all sunk in and now it has. there are no guarantees, nothing is certain and that seems to be a big part of living with cancer. you are right to not let it rule your life and i too feel glad to be here. once i can get on top of this horrendous debilitating anxiety i will be better! 

thankyou and best wishes to you too

Good morning, I hope you a little less stressed now its hard but try keep busy with other things :) It does sound like we may be on the same but the doseage will be different as it goes by your weight and height.... I am not sure the intravenous doseage which is once every three weeks, but the tablets which come in 500mg and 150mg for me is 3800mg twice a day.  Be interesting to know what dose you get.  How you coping and healing from surgery?  Sun is out so its a great day :) hang in there you will be just fine and there aare great drs and nurses to help if any adjustment is needed.  Best wishes JB

morning. i am feeling less anxious now but physically pooped after trying to power walk the anxiety off! too much so in fact so now have some meds to help as want to start next week as energised as poss. spoken to staff at hospital and treament has chnged slighty and spoken through my concerns. its amazing how better you can feel if you just manage to talk it through with someone you feel truly understands. have to say tho there is also a time and place for short term meds if all else fails to calm you down. saying that i now havnt had to use them, but they are there if i need them. im sure anyone out there who has ever experienced severe anxiety and panic attacks will know exactly where im coming from.

one other thing that isnt very helpful is my head! dont know if you had this but since surgery i am very foggy in that department. slowing me up a lot and i have to really focus hard to day to day and write down what im supposed to be doing otherwise i will get ditracted and what i was going to do just diappears off my mental radar completely. im just going with it at the moment and putting it down to the way my mind is coping with it all. minds are weird, well mine is!

hope youre doing ok, sorry have rambled on a bit x

Good morning Mouse

this is great news and sounds like you getting into the zone, I am very pleased reading your message that you getting on with things to the best of your ability.  I don't suffer from anxiety but I feel for you and can't imagine what it must be like to have that as well as what you have and are going to go through so I think you doing AMAZING!! Keep going you not alone and yes I agree its so good to be able to talk things through.  You say your treatment has changed slghtly do you mind me asking what or how - presume you meaning the chemo treatment?  I think you going to be just fine :)

This week I am drug free its so nice having the break from swallowing tablets, back at hospital Monday for bloods and then Tuesday Intravenous if bloods ok.  

You were up early was that for your power walk..... ahhhh good one!! I took advantage of my bed and therefore didn't wake up until 7am - very unusual for me.  Sun is out so like you I will get myself together and go for my walk :)  

No head seems to be normal, well whats normal right hahaha I think you just got a lot going on, thats completely understandable you may be forgetting things etc..... and if you worried tell the nurse or Dr when you next see them.  I think you doing great please come back and let me know how you getting on - when is your first treatment starting?

Best wishes

JB xx

morning, sorry for delay,life here been just a tad busy. probly should not be doing quite so much but life doesnt stop when you have teens. is a good distraction tho. been running around, well not literally as my lovely gp says its prob bit early to be breaking into a gentle jogg. im not an athelete by any stretch of the imagination and ive always used the term running very loosely as i tend to just run when there are cars coming! i think its part of me trying to get my head round having cancer and just be like i used to be.

also trying to get done all the heavier things and get  as organised as poss so if i do feel shattered it will be just little things that will be more manageable

what to eat is bit of a unknown quantity. been on mamillin site and viewed their recipe book online which is helpful. appetite not great and still find can only manage bland foods and not too high fibre and anything greasy complete no no. oh and lime pickle, shame like bit of lime picke! how have you managed with different foods since surgery? did the chemo make much difference?

how are you doing? do you feel better on your week off, I hope so and i hope its a rest or at least a lessening of any pesky side effects.

im planned still for next week and having the oxiwotsit and another drug iv. excuse made up words, but it all gets bit too medical and it seems less scary. i dont know the name of the other drug yet, when the schedule came through it was abbreviated and just a series of capital letters and numbers. not thinking about it too much until i get there as am still bit wobbly and i dont really think it will help me.

well its grey here and everyone else is peacefully asleep. im going to try and compile a list for food shopping and some kind of menu plan for next week so the teens can step in and do the cooking. im just going to stay out the way and put some headphones in! should be interesting, but hopefully edible. oh help even the thought of it! no they will be fine its my fault i should have let them do more sooner. not like the days when i was young and my lovely mum taught me all these home making skills.

thankyou again for chatting with me, your support has been wonderful!

hope all goes well with the next round. sounds like we are going into a boxing ring when said like that eek! will let you know how it goes. take care and will be thinking of you x

Good morning wow sounds like you doing awesome, thats the only way to be - busy doing other things it definitely takes your mind off things for a little while :) proud of you!  hahaha running... hmm dodging cars is a good idea so running works for me too!! 

If I can do this you can.... I am a total wuss!! You should have seen my face when they said I will have a picc line..... YIKES!! But actually its the easy part :) although funnily enough I have an allergic reaction to the sticky plaster that holds it all together **rolling eyes** but its all good the district nurse will find a substitute :)

This week has been great, no swallowing tablets is definitely a fabulous feeling! Only to start IV again on Tuesday if my bloods are good,  

To be honest I had a really good appetite just couldn't eat much, so little and often is the way I went.  Crackers cheese and ham was a great infill for me when I wanted a snack but couldn't be asked to cook.  I also cooked up a heap of mince and put it in the freezer then just use with pasta, baked potato or on toast.  Peanut butter on toast (no butter) also very tasty..... and I have become the female version of popeye loving spinnach more than I used too, plus its good for iron :) I think I figured pineapple upset my tummy since I stopped I seem to be ok, might be something to keep in mind.  I do love pineapple :) but grapes, apple slices and strawberries work too..... they say eat all the white foods, fish, chicken, rice, potato etc.... whilst I do, I also try all the other things I love.... your taste buds will tell you if its good or not haha I avoided very hot spices/chillies which I love and greasy stuff (nothing like a bacon butty so I keep that for Saturday mornings with my son) 

As I am not sure of the exact drugs you taking, one of them oxaliplatin gives numbness and/or tingliing in fingers and toes, my fingers have been fine after around five days or so but my feet only feel normal with thermal socks and winter slipper boots.... this fashion is not for the feint hearted haha

Get the teens running around this is the time they can look after you :) and they will probably love it!!  You will work out day by day what works for you and learn from it.  I still can't believe I had a full abdominal operation! (had total hysterectomy as well)..... that seems to have been the easiest part LOL but so far so good!! Will look forward to you letting me know how you get on when you start and I will update you on my second round :)

YOU and I are going to be just fine ...... always great talking to you and we here to support each other so I will defo be back for more, provided I am not knocked out in the next round..... (boxing :)) take care and enjoy the day we will connect again soon

JB x

Oh I lived on oats porridge or rice crispies for breakfast and gentle fiber worked a treat.... however I did eat my baked potato skins for a little roughage just clean well :)

Boiled eggs (soft and soldiers my all time favourite right from after surgery :) :) :) obviously the kid in me coming out hahaha