Together we will beat cancer


Blind panic from a new member

18 Aug 2019 09:51

Hi all,

I need to share my story as I have no-one to talk to about this. I have 3 children and a partner with chronic illness that I care for.

I went to my doc a few weeks ago because I had missed 3 periods. I thought it was because of my age (46) so didn't think much about it. I had a full blood test and was called back in a few days later for another. It showed my iron levels were low (don't know the figures) and i am not bleeding from anywhere, so was put on iron tablets immediately (which I had to stop taking again last week)-. Because I had a few other symptoms and have a family history of cancer I was put on urgent referral to the hospital. I am due to have endoscopy and colonoscopy on Wednesday and I am panicking like mad.

My other symptoms besides missing periods (which returned a week into the iron tablets) tiredness, weight loss (9lbs), change in toilet habit, bad headaches, ringing in my ears, problems remembering or finding the right word, trying to catch my breath and what I can only describe as internal shakes.

Every single member of my family has either got, had or died of cancer so I'm worried that all my symptoms point to one scary conclusion....

Any advice would be appreciated and help with how to cope on Wednesday for the procedures would be a great help.

Thanks for reading.

Blind panic from a new member

18 Aug 2019 11:04 in response to Aliphant

Hi aliphant 

Hope you don't mind me (man) answering some of the questions when you go in for the camera take someone with you who can drive if you can if you want sedation you have to wait for it to wear off unless you've another driver, some people find procedures painful others are OK I'm afraid it's trial and error, alot of your symptoms "can be stress" you've already set your mind on worst thing, hope I've helped a little bit, best wishes... Billy 

Blind panic from a new member

18 Aug 2019 20:39 in response to Aliphant


Your journey sounds very similar to mine , like you I had blood tests and they told me I was aneamic, I had an endoscopy and a colonoscopy they thought I had a gut bleed but couldn't find anything . 

They put me on iron tablets and it has now cleared up , I also had all your other symptoms heart pounding in my ears ,forgetful, going into a room forgetting what I was there for ,poor concentration , crying al the time ,l went to my Dr and  was told I have depression and anxiety also Ptsd  dr gave me some meds and now I  feel a lot better.

Hope you feel better soon 

Kind Regards


Blind panic from a new member

19 Aug 2019 09:27 in response to Billygoat


Thankyou for your comments. I have opted for sedation but i'm still panicking!


Blind panic from a new member

19 Aug 2019 09:32 in response to Juju2


Thanks for your reply. I already suffer from depression and anxiety (takings meds) and have done since the loss of my mum to cancer when I was 17. My Dad has leukaemia, my brother had thyroid cancer and every single other member of my family has had/got/died of cancer. So the odds are stacked against me. The doctors are convinced that I am losing blood internally and the fact that they are rushing things through is making it even worse! I only went to the docs for 3 missed periods and now my world is upside down!


Blind panic from a new member

19 Aug 2019 09:37 in response to Aliphant

I'm sorry to here that, like you I'm also suffering my sister has terminal cancer bowels liver and lungs  alsoblood clot in leg the moment she is fighting Pnumonia... life is so hard can't stop worrying about my own treatment seeing this is my second cancer in 2 years but in other breast.

I wish you all the best x

Blind panic from a new member

20 Aug 2019 20:14 in response to Juju2

Best wishes to you too. I feel guilty for worrying when I think of other that are going through much worse than me.

Blind panic from a new member

20 Aug 2019 20:49 in response to Aliphant

Never feel guilty ..each cancer  is like a life sentence to that person I spoke to my nurse I have invasive tubular carcinoma E+  wire insertion next Thursday then op on Friday...might need to have radiation ...

Wish you all the best 

Blind panic from a new member

20 Aug 2019 20:56 in response to Aliphant

I am in similar situation but my children are older my husband has serious illness & relies on me. We deny our stress for the others but forums like this helps us to talk and maybe give some friendship as united we stand❤️

Blind panic from a new member

20 Aug 2019 21:34 in response to ChipstarChipstar

Thanks for your kind words. Every day as carers we have to be strong, forget our own troubles and carry the world on our shoulders. It's reassuring to speak to other like minded people who are going through similar.

The only thing taking my mind off it all now is the overwhelming feeling of nausea having just completed tonight's dose of moviprep. I mixed it with orange dilute and the flavour wasn't too bad at all (A bit like sherbet lemon boiled sweets) but just the sheer quantity of liquid you're expected to have is a nightmare. My insides are waterlogged! 

Blind panic from a new member

20 Aug 2019 21:43 in response to Aliphant

We can join hugs & love globally to obviously not cure it but make ourselves as one for future to fight it

Blind panic from a new member

20 Aug 2019 22:26 in response to Aliphant

Just good to share our probs or otherwise we're all alone with our partners 

Blind panic from a new member

26 Aug 2019 09:24 in response to ChipstarChipstar

Well.... the gastroscopy was horrendous and painful but it's over with. They couldn't see anything unusual but took a couple of biopsies anyway.... is that normal?

The prep didn't work properly so they had to reschedule my colonoscopy for this Thursday. So I'll be taking my prep AGAIN on Wednesday night/thurs morn. Not eaten properly.for 2 weeks now. I'm so tired and i've lost 11lb so far. I hope the sedation works for me because after the gastroscopy I'm terrified that the colonoscopy will be just as bad.

Still panicking that they'll find something serious......

Blind panic from a new member

26 Aug 2019 09:37 in response to ChipstarChipstar

Hi just noticed your a carer for husband, I'm carer for my wife, do you get carers allowance, and money off your council tax, we didn't know about it someone told us so I thought I'd pass it on just in case you don't, best wishes. Billy 

Blind panic from a new member

26 Aug 2019 10:55 in response to Billygoat

Morning Billy,

I know you have to find everything out for yourself, assistance/info isn't offered freely.

Did you know you can also get 50% or 100% discount on car tax depending on what level PIP/DLA your wife receives.

You can also get free/discounted entry as a carer, e.g. train travel, event tickets etc.