New to this forum it says go to the introduce yourself section but couldn't find how to get there.  I'm in a scary place.  Haven't had regular smear tests due to abusive life experiences.  First time I forced myself to go doctor she didn't ask my consent and brought her male trainee in without my consent - I was embarrassed and when I told her afterwards she said it was my fault because I didn't say anything.  I have refused tests ever since but felt I'm putting myself at risk.  A few weeks ago my surgery phoned me direct to book an appointment I saw it as a sign I need to do it.  Nurse was lovely at first then she told me how disgusting some women are when they come  in and are smelly and I completely froze again - thinking these people are so judgemental how can you  trust them.  I hemorrhaged for 4 days after the test - never again.  I don't know what this means wasn't told when results would be back am too scared to ask just wish there was somewhere women could go that they would be treated sensitively.