Hi Paul .. I have followed your threads and know your heart was broken ... I'm so so sorry you were kept out of the service and there is no excuse ... no mater what others think , everyone really close should have had an input ...  but that's done now ... 

All I'd do if I were you, have a special place for her .. make a little memory part of the garden if you have one ... and do your own little service ... say the words you'd like to say ... play some music that meant something .. if there's someone close to you, let them do this with you ... l bet l know which one she'd smile over ...  they can never take your memories away ... they are safely tucked up in your heart ... Chrissie

Hi Paul

It is dreadful how suffering has been built on suffering for you.

You have expressed so well the deep love you had for Liz.  She will be in your heart forever despite being unable to contribute to the eulogy.

I hope that you were able to pm Chriss as she is a lovely sympathetic listener.

My heart goes out to you

David

Hi i wasnt left out of sevice i just didnt get to put anything in eulogy. i was in it and it was nice l i kept liz going in hospital and cared for her when she was sick  .i was actually warning people how the law works and if they had planed to be married before or after cancer diagnosis to do it now.  as its so unpredictable and somtimes unpredictable very unexpected. its got nothing to do with money .its that after your parners parners death even thoe in hospital your next  of kin but after your rights to funerals etc are gone you have no recourse to complaints information are gone. A did it to take presher off me but it didnt feel like that .but what i did do was say weddinging vows for liz and i over her coffin with my adult children by. You would not beleive the fuss liz made when they took her engagment ring off in the ward told liz its okay sweetie i have it in my pocket so put it on coffin when i said the vows. Anyway i asked how you were as i feel you have been through some awful things yourself and no one seems to notice this because of there grief but i never forget a kindness .regards paul ps i would like to add that A realised that liz was getting the best care from me anyone could get 

Thank you david your most kind and yes she is as are you to send this message cheers paul

This is how we were liz used to get bad dreams but she said after we met i was always in her dreams with her making her feel safe so thats true love for you made me feel great what hurts the most is this time in reality i couldnt save her much as i tried

Hi ... thanks for asking that's really sweet with what your going through ... l had two more lumps taken out behind my scar ... and got the news they were fine ... so I'm doing really well ... always here, Paul if you need a chat ... this is a long old road your on now ... hold on to everyone who wants to help or listen ... and remember you have had a love with Liz that most will never know ... 

Sending you a big vertual hug ... keep in touch ... Chrissie x

Paul remember there was another famous Paul ,  who even with all his money couldn't save his Linda...

So forgive yourself when sometimes we just have to except there was nothing left to do ...

Listen to "let it be"  l listen to that song when there's just no answers to the questions in my head ..

Just get through today ... then do the same every day ... there's loads of charities or places that look for help like McMillan later when you feel stronger ... you will have empathy with others going through loss ... and you get back more then you give ...  in the mean time hold on ... Chrissie x

Thanks glad your lumps were benigh and hope it keeps that way for you just had a kind post from david another kind person it realy helps  bless you all regards paul

Dear Paulus,  even if you are married the situation can be tough.  Second marriages mean the original family try to take over and leave the current partner out, it's not lack of marriage but lack of compassion.   Don't blame yourself,  you loved each other and hang onto that.  She doesn't know what happened so it's you that is hurt by this.  You are right though, make it legal, it helps in everyday dealings.  Thinking of you.  Carol

hi Paul

only just read this.wish id joined this site when Jayne had her first episode of breast cancer,id of had my eyes opened to what id be getting put through now.sorry this happened to you and sorry that ive spent more time on me and not others on this site that have and are experiencing dreadful sadness and hurt every day.sorry i cannot move on, my love for Jayne knows no bounds.but glad that some can some how look to the future.and learn to live with their loss.