Good morning BuffBuff, 

I know you've had lots of support from other forum members on different posts but just wanted to check in with you and see how Dad is feeling after his 3rd chemo this week. 

Best wishes, 

Jenn
Cancer Chat moderator

Morning Jenn,

thank you for your reply, dads ok he was quite sick on the first night but that's usual for him after treatment.  Has he's scan on the 25th so going to try and just not think about it and enjoy the nxt 3 weeks as much as I can/we can.

i just want to say you guys do truly amazing jobs, all the nurses at the treatment centre, moderators on here like yourself and all the Macmillan staff whether at the centre or on the phone if I call them are like little mother Theresas :-) your seriously are all amazing.  I am also touched by all the people on here, as well as being there for me I t gives me the chance to hopefully be there for others s too and it feels like a little gang of fighters against this horrendous disease.

no one truly understands if they haven't experienced it before so I am very grateful to everyone at this worst time of my life.

dawn

xx

Hello Dawn,

Thanks for posting a question. I am sorry to learn that your dad has lung cancer.

I am a little unsure about what is happening to your dad as I am not directly involved in his care. But I can appreciate that it must be hard to see him less well.  Easier said than done, but try not to be too despondent about the recent dip in your dad’s health. It does not necessarily mean that the cancer is growing it could be that the chemotherapy is taking its toll.

One of the side effects that can occur with chemotherapy is fatigue. This can get worse as the treatment goes along. So this might account for you dad being less well.

I am unsure if your dad’s medical team are aware that things are not quite so good. If not he should let them know as there might be a medical problem that they could correct. For example, people on chemotherapy can experience anaemia  and this can cause fatigue.

I am sorry that I cannot be more specific but I hope that this reply helps a little. Do get back to us if you have any other questions. If you would like to telephone our freephone number is 8080 800 4040. We are here from Monday to Friday between the hours of 9am to 5pm.

All the best,

Jean

Hi Dawn

Im in exactly the same place with my mum. She's got stage 4 lung cancer and just had the scan today to see if round 3 is a good idea (palliative too). She really didnt want chemo (she's had cancer twice before so speaks from experience!) the last time she felt awful, and now is waiting to see the results of the CT to make her mind up.

At the moment, she sleeps loads, but is ok for about 2 hours a day. It really is a *** thing to be going through, and believe me I know how it hurts. Thing is, we know how it's going to end, and its not about us.

We need to find an inner strength to be there for them. Try to make your Dad happy in little, silly ways (it counts) and let him decide how he wants it to go. You sound so caring and lovely, make him smile and laugh, be there for awful appointments, tell him how you feel, but ultimately, let him go how he chooses.

thinking of you both with love

Liz

Hi liz,

thank you for your lovely reply.

im so sorry about your mum, it really is horrible isn't it, poor loves.

I know what you mean about making them laugh dad still has a sense of humour dad and I are very similar so find stupidest of things quite funny so we are still laughing at times.

my dad is so scared that's been one of the hardest things for me I've never ever seen that emotion in my dad.  He is 67 and end of January he was fine a cough that was it, he was so fit couldn't sit still if he wasn't in the garden he was up a ladder fixing/adjusting or making something new, it's like over night he's become disable, he finds it so hard that he wants to do things but can't.  And was of good build and overnight lost all that weight before this I fortunately have never really had anyone I know have cancer and I didn't realise it took you quite so sudden.

i think that is what is so scary "we know how it ends" I'm just so scared of how bad could it get, it's horrible to think/feel I hope that dad just passes away in his sleep, it makes me feel evil like I have written him off. Before chemo he was so horrendously I'll, I suppose I'm scared that he will go back to the same way without it.

i really hope all goes well with your mums scan results, I will be on the same place in the nxt few wks.

keep im touch and let me know how you are both doing.

lots of love

dawn 

xxx

Liz,

ps it's my mum and dads 45th anniversary tomorrow so they are coming to mine for a bbq and I have a nice cake for them, they think it's just my partner, my brother and them but the whole family are coming. So looking king forward to that :-) thought I'd tell you something nice that's happening.  My profile pic is my two puppies Oscar and ted dad loves them so will be looking fwd to seeing them 

xxxx