on 17th August it will be two years since I lost my dad and this is the first time I’m talking to anyone that isn’t a friend or a family member. Dad was diagnosed in March 2016. He had cancer everywhere. He would later die in August the same year. Watching my dad go from being a healthy man to this other person was a struggle. He got weaker everyday. Since he has been gone I do feel like a massive part of me is missing and I’ve changed so much because of it. I cry on my own a lot. I want to go to my mum or sister but i know they are feeling the same grief as me. They can’t be my rock as I can’t be there’s. I’m feeling a lot of guilt too. That I wasn’t there enough. I didn’t appreciate him enough. I’m now planning my wedding day which is also such a struggle as I know he won’t be there to walk me down the aisle or enjoy a family celebration. He would of been the light and soul of the day. He always had a big heart and it didn’t matter who or what you did to him he always would welcome you back with open arms. It’s unfair that someone so good natured was taken from our family. I just wish I could see him one last time to tell him how proud I am to have him as a dad and that I appreciate everything he has done for me.
