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Why can’t I grieve?

12 Jan 2018 19:37

I lost my much loved Dad in December. After being distraught initially, I now feel strange. I feel like I am scared to think about my Dad in case I break down. Not thinking about him in detail is helping me to function normally- to work and get on with life. I am thinking a lot but skirting around examining my feelings too much or imagining my Dad. It’s hard to explain. My Dad deserves to be grieved over. Why can’t I do it? Even at the funeral I felt numb. Am I storing up problems for the future? 

Re: Why can’t I grieve?

12 Jan 2018 20:27 in response to lclark7335

Hi there ... l think sometimes our brains know how much we can cope with at a time ... it knows when to shut things out, and knows what we can handle ... I felt numb at my lovely mum's funeral it was sort of a feeling like l was watching it on t.v ... and felt sort of sad but couldn't understand why I wasn't hysterical..go on 2 years later it was my uncle's funeral ... liked him but not a close relative... I sobbed like a baby ... was really confused ... till later that evening , I realised I was crying for mum ...

So I've learned , there's no right or wrong way to grieve ... no limit as to how long or short ... every one is different ... so be easy on your self, be kind to your heart and know your doing o.k ... but be prepared it can hit you just when you don't expect it ....  go with the flow ... live in the day and trust your brain when it tells you, your being just a normal human being ... that's life ... and I bet hes looking down on you , you just can't see him .....

Sending a big virtual hug ... Chrissie xx ❤

Re: Why can’t I grieve?

13 Jan 2018 07:58 in response to lclark7335


I'm so very sorry for your loss. My Mum passed away in October 2017, and I have also been feeling numb since. It's only for the last few days that I have started to "feel" more. I think it's our brain helping us to cope! I guess  there is no right or wrong way to feel. I try to take one day at a time. Grieving is so confusing.

I am sending you lots of hugs.