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Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 18:38

Hi all.. I don't know where to start but here goes.my dad was diagnosed with prostate cancer on November the 10th 2020.. he was told that he may be able to have chemotherapy,sadly this wasn't the case as it had already spread outside the prostate..we were then told that he couldn't have a operation either,so last resort was radiotheraphy... the devasting news came 4 days before Christmas last year,the cancer had become terminal as its spread past prostate,to his back,right pelvis,and now his ribs.. the consultant already told us that they can't put a time limit on his life.. my hearts been shattered known the time will come,I know I'm not the only one going threw this,but is it normal to feel so upset and worried? Thankyou for taking the time.to read this xx

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 19:22 in response to Kellzy21

Hi Kellzy21

It is normal to feel so worried and upset. I'm going through a similar thing with my partner. We were told on 11th February this year that he has a very large tumour which has spread down his throat and also a lymph node and 3 spots on left lung. It's too large to operate sadly and he has only been offered palliative radiotherapy as he has other underlying health problems. He now has a feeding tube and came out of hospital today. He's lost over 2 stone. I feel broken inside and can't stop crying (trying to be brave in front of him). I'm so sorry you're going through this awful time as well. Sending you lots of love xx

 

 

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 19:31 in response to Chazbomb

So sorry you're going threw this aswell,my dads getting tired easily now hes slowing down, to a point where eating is tiring him out, I've never being in this situation before,and its so heartbreaking not known,when the time will come as I know it will,I have friends to support me but I just honestly don't know what to say to them,they no of the situation though,one so called friend actually said it happens to us all and to get over it,how can I get over this im constantly worried upset the list goes on,im supporting my mam dad and kids but I just needed support meself xxx

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 19:48 in response to Kellzy21

I know what you mean it feels like a horrible nightmare. I think the best thing we can do is try to just take one day at a time and try to make them as comfortable as possible. It's not easy though when you see the person you love deteriorating before your eyes. Nobody can understand unless they've been through this horrific time xx

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 19:52 in response to Chazbomb

Thats all we can do.. be there for them sending u lots of love and hugs... stay strong and im always around if u need to chat or u can send me a friends request if u wish... as everyone needs support at times xx

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 20:00 in response to Kellzy21

Love and hugs to you too. It's helpful to talk to people going through the same thing xx

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 20:03 in response to Chazbomb

Thankyou it is i agree xx

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 20:52 in response to Kellzy21

Hi Kelly my dad has exactly the same ,, it's spread outside the sack although I've had an extra 9 years from diagnosis to now he's had radiotherapy and all the other stuff , it's breaking my heart to watch him go from such a strong man to a frail man , I cry every day wen I see him I cry I no I shouldn't but I love him dearly , and feel cheated he's only 66,worked so hard all his life didn't  even get to retirement  he's in palative chemo now which is making him feel ill sick and tired, hardly eating problems with his bowels bladder  he lost a stone in a month. But it's really showing now ,waiting for a ct to see how far it's spread , I just wanted u to know ur not alone, this is the hardest thing and I wish no one ever had to go through what we are ,,,

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 20:58 in response to caroline1978

Sorry to hear about your dad big hugs sent to u... I know its really heartbreaking,watching someone u love suffer.. my dads been the same working man he's just turned 71 was 70 when diagnosed he is on hormone tablets to stop the cancer mutating.. its just I wanted to talk to someone else nd get advice whos going threw it xxx

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 21:08 in response to Kellzy21

My dad had the Hormone tablets for  years and they worked really well for him but this last year ,, it's been slowly creeping up, I've been very lucky to hv had the years extra , but it's never enough and as much as u say prepare ur self it's going to happen u never are ready , I talk on the phone to him I cry as soon as the phones down when I see him I cuddle him and tell him I love him, and it's bloody hard because he told me he's scared of dying, it's hard to be strong ,, because it's ur dad , xx much love to u x and we hv to try somehow to be strong for them

Wanting some advice

4 Mar 2021 21:15 in response to caroline1978

I totally agree with u my dad has had to have a cathder in as he can't pass water himself.... my heart goes out to any person who's in the same situation me.... but I'm always around for u to keep strong... easier said than done hugs xxxx